American literature -- Humor; American wit and humor
Perhaps these were neither the garments nor the airs in which every
farmer-maiden did her baking. But then, Sally was no ordinary
farmer-maiden. She was all this, it is true, but she was, besides, grace
and color and charm itself. And if she chose to bake in such attire--or,
even, if she chose to pretend to do so, where was the churl to say her
nay, even though the flour was part of a deliberate "make up"? Certainly
he was not at the store that summer morning.
And Seffy was there. Her hair escaped redness by only a little. But that
little was just the difference between ugliness and beauty. For, whether
Sally were beautiful or not--about which we might contend a bit--her
hair was, and perhaps that is the reason why it was nearly always
uncovered--or, possibly, again, because it was so much uncovered was the
reason it was beautiful. It seemed to catch some of the glory of the
sun. Her face had a few freckles and her mouth was a trifle too large.
But, in it were splendid teeth.
In short, by the magic of brilliant color and natural grace she narrowly
escaped being extremely handsome--in the way of a sunburned peach, or a
maiden's-blush apple. And even if you should think she were not
handsome, you would admit that there was an indescribable rustic charm
about her. She was like the aroma of the hay-fields, or the woods, or a
field of daisies, or dandelions.
The girl, laughing, surrendered the money, and the old man, taking an
arm of each, marched them peremptorily away.
"Come to the house and git his clothes. Eferysing goes in--stofepipe
hat, butterfly necktie, diamond pin, toothbrush, hair-oil, razor and
soap."
They had got far enough around the corner to be out of sight of the
store, during this gaiety, and the old man now shoved Seffy and the girl
out in front of him, linked their arms, and retreated to the rear.
"What Sephenijah P. Baumgartner, Senior, hath j'ined together, let
nobody put athunder, begoshens!" he announced.
The proceeding appeared to be painful to Seffy, but not to Sally. She
frankly accepted the situation and promptly put into action its
opportunities for coquetry. She begged him, first, with consummate
aplomb, to aid her in adjusting her parcels more securely, insisting
upon carrying them herself, and it would be impossible to describe
adequately her allures. The electrical touches, half-caress,
half-defiance; the confidential whisperings, so that the wily old man in
the rear might not hear; the surges up against him; the recoveries--only
to surge again--these would require a mechanical contrivance which
reports not only speech but action--and even this might easily fail, so
subtle was it all!
"Sef--Seffy, I thought it was his old watch he was auctioning off. I
wanted it for--for--a nest-egg! aha-ha-ha! You must excuse me."
"You wouldn't 'a' bid at all if you'd knowed it was me, I reckon," said
Seffy.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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