Old Grimes _Albert Gorton Greene_ 24 Piano in Arkansas, A _Thomas Bangs Thorpe_ 112 Quit Yo' Worryin' _Anne Virginia Culbertson_ 157 Rollo Learning to Play _Robert J. Burdette_ 132 Runaway Boy, The _James Whitcomb Riley_ 38 Set of China, The _Elisa Leslie_ 12 Simon Starts in the World _J.J. Hooper_ 96 Spring Beauties, The _Helen Avery Cone_ 9 Strike of One, The _Elliott Flower_ 84 Suppressed Chapters _Carolyn Wells_ 22 Tiddle-Iddle-Iddle-Iddle-Bum! Bum! _Wilbur D. Nesbit_ 218 Whar Dem Sinful Apples Grow _Anne Virginia Culbertson_ 121 Willy and the Lady _Gelett Burgess_ 72 Woman Who Married an Owl, The _Anne Virginia Culbertson_ 44 COMPLETE INDEX AT THE END OF VOLUME X. THE WIT AND HUMOR OF AMERICA THE MARRIAGE OF SIR JOHN SMITH BY PHOEBE CARY Not a sigh was heard, nor a funeral tone, As the man to his bridal we hurried; Not a woman discharged her farewell groan, On the spot where the fellow was married. We married him just about eight at night, Our faces paler turning, By the struggling moonbeam's misty light, And the gas-lamp's steady burning. No useless watch-chain covered his vest, Nor over-dressed we found him; But he looked like a gentleman wearing his best, With a few of his friends around him. Few and short were the things we said, And we spoke not a word of sorrow, But we silently gazed on the man that was wed, And we bitterly thought of the morrow. We thought, as we silently stood about, With spite and anger dying, How the merest stranger had cut us out, With only half our trying. Lightly we'll talk of the fellow that's gone, And oft for the past upbraid him; But little he'll reck if we let him live on, In the house where his wife conveyed him. But our hearty task at length was done, When the clock struck the hour for retiring; And we heard the spiteful squib and pun The girls were sullenly firing. Slowly and sadly we turned to go,-- We had struggled, and we were human; We shed not a tear, and we spoke not our woe, But we left him alone with his woman. THE SPRING BEAUTIES BY HELEN AVERY CONE