What characterises the new mother is that she understands the enormous
significance of the _first years_, when the indispensable “training”
takes place, in which the future life of the child is determined by the
methods employed—whether they be those of torture or of culture,
irrational or rational. Then the great problem must be solved of
establishing willing obedience from within in place of the hitherto
_enforced_ obedience from without; of maintaining self-control, won by
self, in place of self-control _imposed_ from without; of evoking
voluntary renunciation in place of enforcing renunciation. For the
capacity for obedience, for self-control, for renunciation, is one of
the qualities fundamental to the whole later conduct of life. The new
mother knows this as well as the mother of former times. But she
endeavours to create this capacity by slow and sure means. The same
thing obtains in regard to physical and psychical courage, which in the
early years can often be so demoralised by fright that it can never
emerge again. The training which hitherto was customary—based on
_compelling_ and _forbidding_—had its effect only upon the surface and
_prevented_ the child from experiencing _the results of his own choice_.
It is this _indirect_ education by results which is the new mother’s
method. Her unceasing vigilance and consistency are required in order
that the child shall actually bear the results of his actions. What she
needs for this is first and foremost, _time, time_, and again _time_.
Apparently good effects can be obtained much quicker by intervening,
preventing, punishing, but thus are turned aside the _real_ results. By
this method the child is deprived of the _inner_ growth, which only the
fully experienced reality with its components of bitter and sweet can
give; and this growth the new mother endeavours to advance. Much more
time still is necessary to play the psychological game of chess, which
consists in the checkmating of black by white; in other words, the
conquest of negative characteristics by positive, through the child’s
own activity—a task in which the child at first must be guided, just as
in the assimilation of the elements of every other accomplishment, but
in which he can later perfect himself. Modern investigation in the realm
of the soul enables us to see the dangers which sometime will demand
quite as new methods in spiritual hygiene as bacteriology has created in
the hygiene of the body. But we still leave unexercised powers of the
soul, still misunderstand spiritual laws which sometime will radically
transform the means of education. At some future day the new mothers
will institute legal protection for children to an extent
incomprehensible to us and therefore provocative only of smiles. For
example, legal prohibition of corporal punishment by parents as well as
teachers; legal prohibition of child labour, of certain tenement
conditions, certain “amusements,” certain improper uses of the press.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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