_Place_. To return us, madam? _Mrs M_. Yes, my lord, as duly elected; and when we have returned you so, it will be your own fault if you don't prove yourself so. _Place_. Madam, this news has so transported my spirits, that I fear some ill effect unless you instantly give me a dram. _Mrs M_. If your lordship please to walk with me into my closet, I'll equip your lordship. [_Exit_. _Trap_. How do you like that dram, sir? _Sneer_. Oh! most excellent! _Fust_. I can't say so, unless I tasted it. _Trap_. Faith, sir, if it had not been for that dram my play had been at an end. _Fust_. The devil take the dram with all my heart! _Trap_. Now, Mr Fustian, the plot, which has hitherto been only carried on by hints, and opened itself like the infant spring by small and imperceptible degrees to the audience, will display itself like a ripe matron, in its full summer's bloom; and cannot, I think, fail with its attractive charms, like a loadstone, to catch the admiration of every one like a trap, and raise an applause like thunder, till it makes the whole house like a hurricane. I must desire a strict silence through this whole scene. Colonel, stand you still on this side of the stage; and, miss, do you stand on the opposite.--There, now look at each other. A long silence here. _Fust_. Pray, Mr Trapwit, is nobody ever to speak again? _Trap_. Oh! the devil! You have interrupted the scene; after all my precautions the scene's destroyed; the best scene of silence that ever was penned by man. Come, come, you may speak now; you may speak as fast as you please. _Col_. Madam, the army is very much obliged to you for the zeal you shew for it; me, it has made your slave for ever; nor can I ever think of being happy unless you consent to marry me. _Miss M_. Ha! and can you be so generous to forgive all my ill usage of you? _Fust_. What ill usage, Mr Trapwit? For, if I mistake not, this is the first time these lovers spoke to one another. _Trap_. What ill usage, sir? a great deal, sir. _Fust_. When, sir? where, sir?