_Mar. jun_. Sir, you are a man of sense, and express yourself well. I did, as you say, once make a small sally into Parnassus--took a sort of flying leap over Helicon; but if ever they catch me there again--sir, the town have a prejudice to my family; for, if any play could have made them ashamed to damn it, mine must. It was all over plot. It would have made half a dozen novels: nor was it crammed with a pack of wit-traps, like Congreve and Wycherly, where every one knows when the joke was coming. I defy the sharpest critick of them all to have known when any jokes of mine were coming. The dialogue was plain, easy, and natural, and not one single joke in it from the beginning to the end: besides, sir, there was one scene of tender melancholy conversation--enough to have melted a heart of stone; and yet they damned it--and they damned themselves; for they shall have no more of mine. _Wit_. Take pity on the town, sir. _Mar. jun_. I! No, sir, no. I'll write no more. No more; unless I am forced to it. _Luck_. That's no easy thing, Marplay. _Mar. jun_. Yes, sir. Odes, odes, a man may be obliged to write those, you know. _Luck_, and _Wit_. Ha, ha, ha! that's true indeed. _Luck_. But about my tragedy, Mr Marplay. _Mar. jun_. I believe my father is at the playhouse: if you please, we will read it now; but I must call on a young lady first--Hey, who's there? Is my footman there? Order my chair to the door. Your servant, gentlemen.--_Caro vien_. [_Exit, singing_. _Wit_. This is the most finished gentleman I ever saw; and hath not, I dare swear, his equal. _Luck_. If he has, here he comes. SCENE VII.--LUCKLESS, WITMORE, BOOKWEIGHT. _Luck_. Mr Bookweight, your very humble servant. _Book_. I was told, sir, that you had particular business with me. _Luck_. Yes, Mr Bookweight; I have something to put into your hands. I have a play for you, Mr Bookweight. _Book_. Is it accepted, sir? _Luck_. Not yet. _Book_. Oh, sir! when it is, it will be then time enough to talk about it. A play, like a bill, is of no value till it is accepted; nor indeed when it is, very often. Besides, sir, our playhouses are grown so plenty, and our actors so scarce, that really plays are become very bad commodities. But pray, sir, do you offer it to the players or the patentees? _Luck_. Oh! to the players, certainly. _Book_. You are in the right of that. But a play which will do on the stage will not always do for us; there are your acting plays and your reading plays. _Wit_. I do not understand that distinction.