_Mood._ A match, i'faith; do you provide a _domine_, and I'll go tell her our resolutions, and hearten her up against the day of battle. [_Exit._ _Sir John._ Now I think on't, this letter must needs come from Sir Martin; a plot of his, upon my life, to hinder our marriage. _Warn._ I see, sir, you'll still mistake him for a wit; but I'm much deceived, if that letter came not from another hand. _Sir John._ From whom, I pr'ythee? _Warn._ Nay, for that you shall excuse me, sir; I do not love to make a breach between persons, that are to be so near related. _Sir John._ Thou seemest to imply, that my mistress was in the plot. _Warn._ Can you make a doubt on't? Do you not know she ever loved him, and can you hope she has so soon forsaken him? You may make yourself miserable, if you please, by such a marriage. _Sir John._ When she is once mine, her virtue will secure me. _Warn._ Her virtue! _Sir John._ What, do you make a mock on't? _Warn._ Not I; I assure you, sir, I think it no such jesting matter. _Sir John._ Why, is she not honest? _Warn._ Yes, in my conscience is she; for Sir Martin's tongue's no slander. _Sir John._ But does he say to the contrary? _Warn._ If one would believe him,--which, for my part, I do not,--he has in a manner confessed it to me. _Sir John._ Hell and damnation! _Warn._ Courage, sir, never vex yourself; I'll warrant you 'tis all a lie. _Sir John._ But, how shall I be sure 'tis so? _Warn._ When you are married, you'll soon make trial, whether she be a maid or no. _Sir John._ I do not love to make that experiment at my own cost. _Warn._ Then you must never marry. _Sir John._ Ay, but they have so many tricks to cheat a man, which are entailed from mother to daughter through all generations; there's no keeping a lock for that door, for which every one has a key. _Warn._ As, for example, their drawing up their breaths, with--oh! you hurt me, can you be so cruel? then, the next day, she steals a visit to her lover, that did you the courtesy beforehand, and in private tells him how she cozened you; twenty to one but she takes out another lesson with him, to practise the next night. _Sir John._ All this while, miserable I must be their May-game! _Warn._ 'Tis well, if you escape so; for commonly he strikes in with you, and becomes your friend. _Sir John._ Deliver me from such a friend, that stays behind with my wife, when I gird on my sword to go abroad. _Warn._ Ay, there's your man, sir; besides, he will be sure to watch your haunts, and tell her of them, that, if occasion be, she may have wherewithal to recriminate: at least she will seem to be jealous of you; and who would suspect a jealous wife? _Sir John._ All manner of ways I am most miserable. _Warn._ But, if she be not a maid when you marry her, she may make a good wife afterwards; 'tis but imagining you have taken such a man's widow.