2. But see that the _manner_ also wherein you speak, be according to the gospel of Christ. Avoid every thing in look, gesture, word and tone of voice, that savours of _pride_ or self-sufficiency. Studiously avoid every thing magisterial or dogmatical, every thing that looks like arrogance or assuming. Beware of the most distant approach to disdain, overbearing, or _contempt_. With equal care avoid all appearance of _anger_, and though you use great plainness of speech, yet let there be no reproach, no railing accusation, no token of any warmth, but that of love. Above all, let there be no shadow of _hate_ or ill-will, no bitterness or sourness of expression; but use the air and language of sweetness as well as gentleness, that all may appear to flow from love in the heart. And yet this sweetness need not hinder your speaking in the most serious and solemn manner: as far as may be, in the very words of the oracles of God, (for there are none like them) as under the eye of him who is coming to judge the quick and dead. 3. If you have not an opportunity of speaking to him in person, or cannot have access, you may do it by a messenger; by a common friend, in whose prudence, as well as uprightness, you can throughly confide. Such a person, speaking in your name, and in the spirit and manner above described, may answer the same end, and in a good degree supply your lack of service. Only beware you do not _feign_ the want of opportunity, in order to shun the cross; neither take it for granted, that you cannot have access, without ever making the trial. Whenever you can speak in your own person, it is far better. But you should rather do it by another than not at all: this way is better than none. 4. But what if you can neither speak yourself, nor find such a messenger as you can confide in? If this be really the case, it then only remains, to write. And there may be some circumstances, which make this the most advisable way of speaking. One of these circumstances is, when the person with whom we have to do, is of so warm and impetuous a temper, as does not easily bear reproof, especially from an equal or inferior. But it may be so introduced and softened in writing, as to make it far more tolerable. Besides, many will read the very same words, which they could not bear to hear. It does not give so violent a shock to their pride, nor so sensibly touch their honour. And suppose it makes little impression at first, they will perhaps give it a second reading, and upon farther consideration, lay to heart, what before they disregarded. If you add your name, this is nearly the same thing, as going to him, and speaking in person. And this should always be done, unless it be rendered improper by some very particular reason.