The Works of Thomas Hood; Vol. 02 (of 11): Comic and Serious, in Prose and Verse, With All the Original IllustrationsHood, Thomas
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The Works of Thomas Hood; Vol. 02 (of 11): Comic and Serious, in Prose and Verse, With All the Original Illustrations
Hood, Thomas
English poetry -- 19th century; English wit and humor; Humorous poetry, English
Time hung heavily on our hands, for our fast days seemed to pass very
slowly, and our strength was rapidly sinking from being so much afloat.
Still we nourished Hope, though we had nothing to give her. But at last
we lost all prospect of land, if one may so say when no land was in
sight. The weather got thicker as we were getting thinner; and though
we kept a sharp watch, it was a very bad look-out. We could see nothing
before us but nothing to eat and drink. At last the fog cleared off,
and we saw something like land right a-head, but alas, the wind was
in our teeth as well as in our stomachs. We could do nothing but keep
her near, and as we could not keep ourselves full, we luckily suited
the course of the boat; so that after a tedious beating about--for
the wind not only gives blows, but takes a great deal of beating--we
came incontinently to an island. Here we landed, and our first impulse
on coming to dry land was to drink. There was a little brook at hand
to which we applied ourselves till it seemed actually to murmur at
our inordinate thirst. Our next care was to look for some food, for
though our hearts were full at our escape, the neighbouring region was
dreadfully empty. We succeeded in getting some natives out of their
bed, and ate them, poor things, as fast as they got up, but with some
difficulty in getting them open; a common oyster-knife would have been
worth the price of a sceptre. Our next concern was to look out for a
lodging, and at last we discovered an empty cave, reminding me of an
old inscription at Portsmouth, “The whole of this place to let.” We
took the precaution of rolling some great stones to the entrance, for
fear of last lodgers,--that some bear might come home from business,
or a tiger to tea. Here, under the rock, we slept without rocking,
and when, through the night’s failing, the day broke, we saw with the
first instalment of light that we were upon a small desert isle, now
for the first time an Isle of Man. Accordingly, the birds in this wild
solitude were so little wild, that a number of boobies and noddies
allowed themselves to be taken by hand, though the asses were not such
asses as to be caught. There was an abundance of rabbits, which we
chased unremittingly, as Hunt runs Warren; and when coats and trousers
fell short, we clothed our skins with theirs, till, as Monday said,
we each represented a burrow. In this work Monday was the tailor, for
like the maker of shadowy rabbits and cocks upon the wall, he could
turn his hand to anything. He became a potter, a carpenter, a butcher,
and a baker--that is to say, a master butcher and a master baker, for
I became merely his journeyman. Reduced to a state of nature, Monday’s
favourite phrase for our condition, I found my being an officer
fulfilled no office; to confess the truth, I made a very poor sort of
savage, whereas Monday, I am persuaded, would have been made a chief by
any tribe whatever. Our situations in life were completely reversed;
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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