The Works of Thomas Hood; Vol. 02 (of 11): Comic and Serious, in Prose and Verse, With All the Original IllustrationsHood, Thomas
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The Works of Thomas Hood; Vol. 02 (of 11): Comic and Serious, in Prose and Verse, With All the Original Illustrations
Hood, Thomas
English poetry -- 19th century; English wit and humor; Humorous poetry, English
he became the leader and I the follower, or rather, to do justice to
his attachment and ability, he became like a strong big brother to a
helpless little one.
[Illustration: IN EMBARRASSED CIRCUMSTANCES.]
We remained in a state of nature five years, when at last a whaler of
Hull--though the hull was not visible--showed her masts on the horizon,
an event which was telegraphed by Monday, who began saying his prayers
and dancing the College Hornpipe at the same time with equal fervour.
We contrived by lighting a fire, literally a _feu-de-joie_, to make a
sign of distress, and a boat came to our signal deliverance. We had a
prosperous passage home, where the reader may anticipate the happiness
that awaited us; but not the trouble that was in store for me and
Monday. Our parting was out of the question; we would both rather have
parted from our sheet anchor. We attempted to return to our relative
rank, but we had lived so long in a kind of liberty and equality,
that we could never resume our grades. The state of nature remained
uppermost with us both, and Monday still watched over and tended me
like Dominie Sampson with the boy Harry Bertram; go where I would, he
followed with the dogged pertinacity of Tom Pipes; and do what I might,
he interfered with the resolute vigour of John Dory in Wild Oats. This
disposition involved us daily, nay, hourly, in the most embarrassing
circumstances; and how the connexion might have terminated I know not,
if it had not been speedily dissolved in a very unexpected manner. One
morning poor Monday was found on his bed in a sort of convulsion, which
barely enabled him to grasp my hand, and to falter out, “Good-bye, I am
go--going--back--to a state of nature.”
[Illustration: A GOOD ACTION MEETS ITS OWN REWARD.]
DOG-GREL VERSES, BY A POOR BLIND.
“Hark! hark! the dogs do bark,
The beggars are coming....”--OLD BALLAD.
OH what shall I do for a dog?
Of sight I have not got a particle,
Globe, Standard, or Sun,
Times, Chronicle--none
Can give _me_ a good leading article.
A Mastiff once led me about,
But people appeared so to fear him--
I might have got pence
Without his defence,
But Charity would not come near him.
A Blood-hound was not much amiss,
But instinct at last got the upper;
And tracking Bill Soames,
And thieves to their homes,
I never could get home to supper.
A Fox-hound once served me as guide,
A good one at hill and at valley;
But day after day
He led me astray,
To follow a milk-woman’s tally.
A turnspit once did me good turns
At going and crossing, and stopping;
Till one day his breed
Went off at full speed,
To spit at a great fire in Wapping.
A Pointer once pointed my way,
But did not turn out quite so pleasant,
Each hour I’d a stop
At a Poulterer’s shop
To point at a very high pheasant.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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