_Sly._ Am I a lord? and have I such a lady? Or do I dream? or have I dream'd till now? I do not sleep: I see, I hear, I speak; I smell sweet savours and I feel soft things: Upon my life, I am a lord indeed 70 And not a tinker nor Christophero Sly. Well, bring our lady hither to our sight; And once again, a pot o' the smallest ale. _Sec. Serv._ Will't please your mightiness to wash your hands? O, how we joy to see your wit restored! 75 O, that once more you knew but what you are! These fifteen years you have been in a dream; Or when you waked, so waked as if you slept. _Sly._ These fifteen years! by my fay, a goodly nap. But did I never speak of all that time? 80 _First Serv._ O, yes, my lord, but very idle words: For though you lay here in this goodly chamber, Yet would you say ye were beaten out of door; And rail upon the hostess of the house; And say you would present her at the leet, 85 Because she brought stone jugs and no seal'd quarts: Sometimes you would call out for Cicely Hacket. _Sly._ Ay, the woman's maid of the house. _Third Serv._ Why, sir, you know no house nor no such maid, Nor no such men as you have reckon'd up, 90 As Stephen Sly and old John Naps of Greece And Peter Turph and Henry Pimpernell And twenty more such names and men as these Which never were nor no man ever saw. _Sly._ Now Lord be thanked for my good amends! 95 _All._ Amen. _Sly._ I thank thee: thou shalt not lose by it. _Enter the_ Page _as a lady_, _attended_. _Page._ How fares my noble lord? _Sly._ Marry, I fare well; for here is cheer enough. Where is my wife? 100 _Page._ Here, noble lord: what is thy will with her? _Sly._ Are you my wife and will not call me husband? My men should call me 'lord:' I am your good-man. _Page._ My husband and my lord, my lord and husband; I am your wife in all obedience. 105 _Sly._ I know it well. What must I call her? _Lord._ Madam. _Sly._ Al'ce madam, or Joan madam? _Lord._ 'Madam,' and nothing else: so lords call ladies. _Sly._ Madam wife, they say that I have dream'd 110 And slept above some fifteen year or more. _Page._ Ay, and the time seems thirty unto me, Being all this time abandon'd from your bed. _Sly._ 'Tis much. Servants, leave me and her alone. Madam, undress you and come now to bed. 115