"The natural and original man," said he, "lived in the woods; the roots
and fruits of the earth supplied his simple nutriment; he had few
desires, and no diseases. But, when he began to sacrifice victims on the
altar of superstition, to pursue the goat and the deer, and, by the
pernicious invention of fire, to pervert their flesh into food, luxury,
disease, and premature death were let loose upon the world. From that
period the stature of mankind has been in a state of gradual diminution,
and I have not the least doubt that it will continue to grow _small by
degrees, and lamentably less_, till the whole race will vanish
imperceptibly from the face of the earth."
"I cannot agree," said Mr. Foster, "in the consequences being so very
disastrous, though I admit that in some respects the use of animal food
retards the perfectibility of the species."
"In the controversy concerning animal and vegetable food," said Mr.
Jenkison, "there is much to be said on both sides. I content myself with
a mixed diet, and make a point of eating whatever is placed before me,
provided it be good in its kind."
In this opinion his two brother philosophers practically coincided,
though they both ran down the theory as highly detrimental to the best
interests of man.
The discussion raged for some time on the question whether man was a
carnivorous or frugivorous animal.
"I am no anatomist," said Mr. Jenkison, "and cannot decide where doctors
disagree; in the meantime, I conclude that man is omnivorous, and on
that conclusion I act."
"Your conclusion is truly orthodox," said the Reverend Doctor Gaster;
"indeed, the loaves and fishes are typical of a mixed diet; and the
practise of the church in all ages shows----"
"That it never loses sight of the loaves and fishes," said Mr. Escot.
"It never loses sight of any point of sound doctrine," said the reverend
doctor.
The coachman now informed them their time was elapsed.
"You will allow," said Mr. Foster, as soon as they were again in motion,
"that the wild man of the woods could not transport himself over two
hundred miles of forest with as much facility as one of these vehicles
transports you and me."
"I am certain," said Mr. Escot, "that a wild man can travel an immense
distance without fatigue; but what is the advantage of locomotion? The
wild man is happy in one spot, and there he remains; the civilised man
is wretched in every place he happens to be in, and then congratulates
himself on being accommodated with a machine that will whirl him to
another, where he will be just as miserable as ever."
_II.--The Squire and his Guests_
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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