The World's Illusion, Volume 2 (of 2): RuthWassermann, Jakob
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The World's Illusion, Volume 2 (of 2): Ruth
Wassermann, Jakob
German fiction -- Translations into English
A dream! She stood in front of a barn which had a little window in
its slanting roof. A man and a woman had just disappeared through
that window. She knew their purpose at once. In the darkness,
half-invisible, stood two lads, and it enraged the dreamer that the
lads were eagerly listening. She herself was tormented by the sensual
envy and hatred that arises in people when they see others in the
throes of passion. Her blood tingled and her heart throbbed. Suddenly
the barn seemed to have swung around, or she to have insensibly changed
her station. The barn was open; one whole wall had disappeared. But the
couple were not above, where they had entered; they were down in the
depths. The man was fully clothed, but nothing was visible of the woman
except her black stockings in the straw. From them both streamed forth
something unspeakably disgustful--a heated, sweetish air. The two lads,
as though seized by St. Vitus’ dance, hurled themselves at each other.
Then Karen felt her bodily personality dissolve. She was no longer
Karen; she was that sensual miasma, she was the woman with the man.
She lost herself in the straw, in its reddish-brown light, in those
black stockings; and as she lay there, her body swelled and expanded
and became a gelatinous, greyish-yellow ball, and reached even to the
roof of the barn. Then the ball became transparent, and she saw within
it lizards and toads and tiny, scarlet horses, on which tiny horsemen
were riding, and soldiers and spiders and worms, a loathsome swarm. The
horrible passions that penetrated everything turned into a throttling
torment. The ball burst. A corpse fluttered about like charred paper. A
white shadow expanded. Karen gave a shriek, and started from her sleep.
Her first gesture was to grasp the pearls.
Christian went up to the bed.
She murmured wildly: “Are you still here? What are you doing?”
He gave her water to drink. “I’ve been dreaming,” she said, and touched
the glass with trembling lips. The elements of her dream were already
dissolving in her mind and escaping a formulation in speech. But the
sense of that dream’s frightfulness increased; in the depth of her
consciousness flickered the terror of death.
“I’ve been dreaming,” she repeated and shook. After a while she asked:
“Why are you up so late? What did you do all day that you’ve got to
work till late at night? Why do you work so hard? Tell me!”
He shook his head and the words, “Ruth, little Ruth,” passed through
his head. “Didn’t your mother visit you to-day?” he asked, and smoothed
her pillows.
“Tell me what you’ve been doing all day!” she persisted.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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