The World's Illusion, Volume 2 (of 2): RuthWassermann, Jakob
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The World's Illusion, Volume 2 (of 2): Ruth
Wassermann, Jakob
German fiction -- Translations into English
“Nothing that I know of,” Johanna replied. She wrinkled her forehead
like one who was helpless and at bay. To get rid of the burden of
his insistence courteously, she promised to write him; but she had
scarcely uttered the words when they made her very unhappy. A promise
had something very binding to her. It made her feel a victim; and the
uncanny tension which this man caused her to feel paralyzed her will,
and yet had a morbid attraction for her.
Voss drove home in a motor car. His mind was filled by one gnawing,
flaring thought: Had she been Christian’s mistress or not? From
the moment he had seen Johanna again, this question had assumed an
overwhelming importance in his mind. It involved possession and
renunciation, ultimate veracity and deceit; it involved inferences that
inflamed his senses, and possibilities that threatened to be decisive
in his life. He fixed his thoughts upon the image of Johanna’s face,
and studied it like a cabalistic document. He argued and analysed and
shredded motives and actions like a pettifogger. For his darkened
life had again been entered by one who caused strange entanglements
and enchainments and focused all decisions in one point. He felt the
presage of storms such as he had not ever known.
Next morning, when he came from his bath and was about to sit down to
breakfast, his housekeeper said to him: “Fräulein Engelschall is here
to see you. She’s in the sitting-room.”
He swallowed his chocolate hastily and went in. Karen sat at a round
table, and looked at photographs that were lying on it. They all
belonged to Christian and were pictures of friends, of landscapes and
houses, of dogs and horses.
Karen wore a very simple suit of blue. Her yellow hair was hidden by
a grey felt hat adorned by a silk riband. Her face was thin, her skin
pale, her expression sombre.
She disdained to use any introductory turns of speech and said: “I’ve
come to ask you if you know about things. He might have told you
first; he didn’t tell me till yesterday. So you don’t know? Well, you
couldn’t have done nothing about it either. He’s given away all his
money. All the money he had, he’s given to his father. The rest too,
that came in by the year, I don’t know how many hundred thousands--he’s
refused that too. He kept his claim to just a little,--not much more
than to keep from starving, and, by what he told me, he can’t use that
the way he wants to. And you know how he is; he won’t change. It’s just
like when the sexton’s through ringing the church bell; you can’t get
back the sound of the chiming. It makes me feel like screaming, like
just lying down and screaming. I says to him: ‘My God, what’ve you gone
and done?’ And he made a face, as if he was surprised to see any one
get excited over a little thing like that. And now I ask you: Can he do
that? Is it possible? Does the law allow it?”
Amadeus was quite silent. His face was ashen. Yellow sparks leaped
behind his lenses. Twice he passed his hand over his mouth.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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