"Well, last night I placed my watch on my window--before retiring, you know; and in the night," continued Sir Asinus, "it commenced raining----" "That was last night?" "Yes, Madam Belle-bouche. Well, the roof leaked, and presto! when I rose I found my watch swimming in water--your watch-paper all soaked and torn--that is to say, my fingers tore it; and a dozen minuets I had bought for you shared the same fate, not to mention my jemmy-worked garters! My ill luck was complete--_me miserum_!" "Was it at college?" "Oh no," said Sir Asinus; "you know I am temporarily absent from the _Alma Mater_." "Indeed!" "Yes. I have taken up my residence in town--in Gloucester street, where I am always happy to see my friends. Just imagine a man persecuted by the professors of the great University of William and Mary for the reason I was." "What was it?" "Because I uttered some heresies. I said the Established Church was a farce, and that women, contrary to the philosophy of antiquity, really had souls. The great Doctor could pardon my fling at the church; but being an old woman himself, could not pardon my even seeming to revive the discussion of the heresy in relation to your sex. What was the consequence? I had to flee--the enemy went about to destroy me; behold me now the denizen of a second floor in old Mother Bobbery's house, Gloucester street, city of Williamsburg." "Rusticating you call it, I think," says Belle-bouche, smiling languidly, and raising her brow to catch the faint May breeze which moves her curls. "Yes; rusticating is the very word--derived from _rus_, a Latin word signifying _main street_, and _tike_, a Greek word meaning to _live in bachelor freedom_. It applies to me exactly, you see. I live in bachelor freedom on Gloucester street, and I only want a wife to make my happiness complete." Belle-bouche smiles. "You are then dissatisfied?" she says. "Yes," sighs Sir Asinus; "yes, in spite of my pipes and books and pictures, and all appliances and means to boot for happiness, I am lonely. Now suppose I had a charming little wife--a paragon of a wife, with blue eyes and golden curls, and a sweet languishing air, to chat with in the long days and gloomy evenings!" Belle-bouche recognises her portrait, and smiles. Sir Asinus continues: "Not only would I be happier, but more at my ease. To tell you the humiliating truth, my dear Miss Belle-bouche, I am in hourly fear of being arrested." "Would a wife prevent that?" "Certainly. What base proctor would dare lay hands upon a married man? But this all disappears like a vision--it is a dream: _fuit Ilium, ingens gloria Teucrorumque_; which means, 'Mrs. Tom is still in a state of single blessedness,' that being the literal translation of the Hebrew." And Sir Asinus smiles; and seeing Jacques approach, looks at him triumphantly. Jacques has just been bitten by the lap dog; and this, added to his melancholy and jealousy, causes him to feel desolate.