It was sometime later when the man began to prepare for the evening to
which he had looked forward with such eagerness and all his fierce and
driving haste was gone. The mad tumult of his manhood strength was
stilled. He moved, now, with a purpose, sullen, grim, defiant. The
fight was on. While he was still vividly conscious of the woman whose
compelling power he felt, he felt, now, as well, the pure touch of
those baby lips. While he still saw the light in the woman's eyes and
sensed the meaning of her smile, he saw and sensed as clearly the
loving innocence that had shown in the little girl's face as it was
lifted up to his. Upon his manhood's strength lay the woman's luring
spell. Upon his manhood the baby's kiss lay as a seal of
sacredness--upon his lips it burned as a coal of holy fire. The fight
was on.
The man's life was not at all an easy life. Beside his work and his
memories there was little to hold him true. Since that day when he
stood face to face with Life and, for the first time, knew that he was
a man, he had been, save for a few friends among the men of his own
class, alone. The exacting demands of his work had left him little
time or means to spend in seeking social pleasures or in the delights
of fellowship with those for whose fellowship he would have cared,
even had the way to their society been, at that period of his life,
open to him. He told himself, always, that sometime in the future,
when he had worked out still farther his dreams, he would find the way
to the social life that he would enjoy but until then, he must, of
necessity, live much alone. And now--now--the testing time--the crisis
in his life--had come. Even as it must come to every man who knows his
manhood so it had come to him.
The man was not deceived. He knew the price he would pay in defeat.
But, even while he knew this--even while he knew what defeat would
mean to him, so great was her power that he went on making ready to go
to her. With the kiss of the little girl upon his lips he made ready
to go to the woman. It was as though he had drifted too far and the
current had become too strong for him to turn back. Thus do such men
yield to such temptations. Thus are men betrayed by the very strength
of their manhood.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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