With mad determination he waited the hour. Uneasily he paced his room.
He tried to read. He threw himself into a chair only to arise and move
about again. Every few moments he impatiently consulted his watch. At
every step in the hall, without his door, he started as if alarmed. He
became angry, in a blind rage, with the woman, with himself and even
with the little girl. At last, when it was time to go, he threw on his
overcoat, took his hat and gloves, and, with a long, careful look
about the room, laid his hand on the door. He knew that the man who
was going out that evening would not come hack to his room the same
man. He knew that _that_ man could never come back. He felt as
though he was giving up his apartments to a stranger. So he hesitated,
with his hand upon the door, looking long and carefully about. Then
quickly he threw open the door and, down the hall and down the stairs,
went as one who has counted the cost and determined recklessly.
[Illustration: Two dimpled arms went around his neck]
The man had opened the front door and was about to pass out when a
sweet voice called: "Wait, oh, wait."
Turning, he saw a tiny figure in white flying toward him.
The little girl, all ready for bed, had caught sight of him and, for
the moment, had escaped from her mother's attention.
The man shut the door and caught her up. Two dimpled arms went around
his neck and the rosebud mouth was lifted to his lips.
Then the mother came and led her away while the man stood watching her
as she went.
Would he ever dare touch those baby lips again he wondered. Could he,
he asked himself, could he face again those baby eyes? Could he ever
again bear the feeling of that soft little body in his arms?
At the farther end of the hall, she turned, and, seeing him still
there, waved her hand with a merry call: "Good-bye, good-bye."
Then she passed from his sight and, in place of this little girl of
rosy, dimpled, flesh, the startled man saw a dainty maiden of his
Yesterdays, standing under a cherry tree with fallen petals of the
delicate blossoms in her wayward hair, and with eyes that looked at
him very gravely and a little frightened as, for the shaggy coated
minister, he spoke the solemn words: "I pronounce you husband and wife
and anything that God has done must never be done any different by
anybody forever and ever, Amen." By some holy magic the kiss of the
little girl became the kiss of his play wedding wife of the long ago.
Very slowly the man went up the stairs again to his room; there to
spend the evening not as he had planned, when he was in the mastering
grip of self, but safe in the quiet harbor of the Yesterdays where the
storms of life break not or are felt only in those gentle ripples that
scarce can stir the surface of the sea.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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