American wit and humor; Evolution (Biology) -- Wit and humor
Imagine you are watching the Bandarlog at play in the forest. As you
behold them and comprehend their natures, now hugely brave and
boastful, now full of dread, the most weakly emotional of any
intelligent species, ever trying to attract the notice of some greater
animal, not happy indeed unless noticed,--is it not plain they are
bound to invent things called gods? Don't think for the moment of
whether there are gods or not; think of how sure these beings would be
to invent them. (Not wait to find them.) Having small self-reliance
they can not bear to face life alone. With no self-sufficingness, they
must have the countenance of others. It is these pressing needs that
will hurry the primates to build, out of each shred of truth they can
possibly twist to their purpose, and out of imaginings that will
impress them because they are vast, deity after deity to prop up their
souls.
What a strange company they will be, these gods, in their day, each of
them an old bearded simian up in the sky, who begins by fishing the
universe out of a void, like a conjurer taking a rabbit out of a hat.
(A hat which, if it resembled a void, wasn't there.) And after creating
enormous suns and spheres, and filling the farthest heavens with vaster
stars, one god will turn back and long for the smell of roast flesh,
another will call desert tribes to "holy" wars, and a third will grieve
about divorce or dancing.
All gods that any groups of simians ever conceive of, from the
woodenest little idol in the forest to the mightiest Spirit, no matter
how much they may differ, will have one trait in common: a readiness to
drop any cosmic affair at short notice, focus their minds on the
far-away pellet called Earth, and become immediately wholly concerned,
aye, engrossed, with any individual worshipper's woes or desires,--a
readiness to notice a fellow when he is going to bed. This will bring
indescribable comfort to simian hearts; and a god that neglects this
duty won't last very long, no matter how competent he may be in other
respects.
But one must reciprocate. For the maker of the Cosmos, as they see him,
wants noticing too; he is fond of the deference and attention that
simians pay him, and naturally he will be angry if it is withheld;--or
if he is not, it will be most magnanimous of him. Hence prayers and
hymns. Hence queer vague attempts at communing with this noble kinsman.
To desire communion with gods is a lofty desire, but hard to attain
through an ignobly definite creed. Dealing with the highest, most
wordless states of being, the simians will attempt to conceive them in
material form. They will have beliefs, for example, as to the
furnishings and occupations in heaven. And why? Why, to help men to
have religious conceptions without themselves being seers,--which in
any true sense of "religious" is an impossible plan.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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