American wit and humor; Evolution (Biology) -- Wit and humor
Our monkey-blood is also apparent in our judgments of crime. If a
crime is committed on impulse, we partly forgive it. Why? Because,
being simians, with a weakness for yielding to impulses, we like to
excuse ourselves by feeling not accountable for them. Elephants
would have probably taken an opposite stand. They aren't creatures
of impulse, and would be shocked at crimes due to such causes; their
fault is the opposite one of pondering too long over injuries, and
becoming vindictive in the end, out of all due proportion. If a
young super-elephant were to murder another on impulse, they would
consider him a dangerous character and string him right up. But if
he could prove that he had long thought of doing it, they would tend
to forgive him. "Poor fellow, he brooded," they would say. "That's
upsetting to any one."
As to modesty and decency, if we are simians we have done well,
considering: but if we are something else--fallen angels--we have
indeed fallen far. Not being modest by instinct we invent artificial
ideals, which are doubtless well-meaning but are inherently of course
second-rate, so that even at our best we smell prudish. And as
for our worst, when we as we say let ourselves go, we dirty the
life-force unspeakably, with chuckles and leers. But a race so
indecent by nature as the simians are would naturally have a hard
time behaving as though they were not: and the strain of pretending
that their thoughts were all pretty and sweet, would naturally send
them to smutty extremes for relief. The standards of purity we have
adopted are far too strict--for simians.
XIV
We were speaking a while ago of the fertility with which simians
breed. This is partly due to the constant love interest they
take in each other, but it is also reenforced by their reliance
on numbers. That reliance will be deep, since, to their numbers,
they will owe much success. It will be thus that they will drive
out other species, and garrison the globe. Such a race would
naturally come to esteem fertility. It will seem profane not to.
As time goes on, however, the advantage of numbers will end; and
in their higher stages, large numbers will be a great drawback. The
resources of a planet are limited, at each stage of the arts. Also,
there is only a limited space on a planet. Yet it will come hard
to them to think of ever checking their increase. They will bring
more young into existence than they can either keep well or feed.
The earth will be covered with them everywhere, as far as eye can
see. North and south, east and west, there will always be simians
huddling. Their cities will be far more distressing than cities of
vermin,--for vermin are healthy and calm and successful in life.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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