"This was a man" : $b A comedy in three actsCoward, Noël
General
"This was a man" : $b A comedy in three acts
Coward, Noël
Comedy plays; English drama (Comedy) -- 20th century; Triangles (Interpersonal relations) -- Drama
[_Bored_]
Oh—give her mine when she rings up again.
EDWARD
You’ll see her to-night at the Harringtons’.
CAROL
No, I shan’t. I’m not going. They’re going to have that awful string
quartette again. I suffered so acutely last time.
EDWARD
I shall go by myself, then.
CAROL
Never mind. You’ll be able to talk to Zoe.
EDWARD
Where are you dining?
CAROL
With the Challoners at the Embassy; then we’re going on somewhere.
EDWARD
Do you want the car?
CAROL
No. They’re picking me up.
EDWARD
Right. I’ll go and dress. Don’t go, Evie. We might have a slight aperitif
at one of your disreputable clubs before dinner.
CAROL
Are you dining together?
EDWARD
No. I’m going to the Russian Ballet with Richard and Sheila. They’ve got
a box or something.
[_EDWARD goes off into his bedroom._]
EVELYN
You’re looking charming, Carol.
CAROL
[_Raising her eyebrows_]
Thank you.
EVELYN
That’s a splendid hat. Is it new?
CAROL
No—incredibly old.
EVELYN
Well, it doesn’t look it.
CAROL
I’m glad.
[_She goes toward the door._]
EVELYN
Carol—
CAROL
[_Turning_]
Yes?
EVELYN
Nothing.
CAROL
[_Surprised_]
Is there anything the matter?
EVELYN
No—honestly it’s nothing.
CAROL
Oh well, I must go and dress, too. See you later on.
EVELYN
I shall be gone when you come down.
CAROL
Really, Evie, you’re behaving very strangely.
EVELYN
Why?
CAROL
I don’t know. You seem different, somehow.
EVELYN
Won’t you stay and talk for a moment. I haven’t seen you to speak to for
ages.
CAROL
That’s your fault.
EVELYN
You’re always so engaged.
CAROL
I never seem to have a minute for anything. I _do_ wish life wasn’t so
hectic.
EVELYN
Why do you let it be?
CAROL
I don’t. It just happens like that.
EVELYN
I’d resent it a good deal if you were my wife.
CAROL
[_Smiling_]
Aren’t you glad I’m not, Evie?
EVELYN
I don’t know.
CAROL
[_Surprised_]
Well, now! I thought you disliked me thoroughly!
EVELYN
Disliked you?
CAROL
Yes. You always have such a polite preoccupied air with me. It makes me
feel terribly frivolous and shallow.
EVELYN
How can you, Carol?
CAROL
[_Gayly_]
It’s true. You’re the kind of man who despises women dreadfully—I know
you are.
EVELYN
You’re quite wrong. I adore them.
CAROL
Well, that’s a lovely surprise, isn’t it?
EVELYN
I can’t get over you imagining that I disliked you.
CAROL
I expect it’s because you’re so tremendously fond of Edward. One always
feels that with one’s husband’s friends.
EVELYN
I don’t see any reason, just because I like Edward, that——
CAROL
Don’t you, Evie?
EVELYN
Of course not.
CAROL
Well, I’m very, very glad.
EVELYN
That’s settled, then, isn’t it?
CAROL
Quite. I shan’t be frightened of you any more.
EVELYN
Frightened of me! How ridiculous!
CAROL
It isn’t ridiculous; it’s quite natural.
EVELYN
I don’t see why. I’m perfectly harmless.
CAROL
Are you?
EVELYN
Mild as a kitten.
CAROL
I wonder.
EVELYN
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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