Artists and patrons -- Fiction; Authors and readers -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Italy -- Fiction; Satire
How lucky that Dante should also have lost his way, six hundred and
twenty-four years ago! “In a word,” Mr. Cardan went on, “_ho perso la
mia strada_—though I have my doubts whether that’s very idiomatic.
_Forse potrebbero darmi qualche indicazione._” In the presence of the
strangers and at the sound of his own voice conversing, all Mr. Cardan’s
depression had vanished. He was delighted by the fantastic turn he had
managed to give the conversation at its inception. Perhaps with a little
ingenuity he would be able to find an excuse for treating them to a
little Leopardi. It was so amusing to astonish the natives.
The two silhouettes, meanwhile, had halted at a little distance. When
Mr. Cardan had finished his macaronic self-introduction, the taller of
them answered in a harsh and, for a man’s, a shrill voice: “There’s no
need to talk Italian. We’re English.”
“I’m enchanted to hear it,” Mr. Cardan protested. And he explained at
length and in his mother tongue what had happened to him. It occurred to
him, at the same time, that this was a very odd place to find a couple
of English tourists.
The harsh voice spoke again. “There’s a path to Massarosa through the
fields,” it said. “And there’s another, in the opposite direction, that
joins the Viareggio road. But they’re not very easy to find in the dark,
and there are a lot of ditches.”
“One can but perish in the attempt,” said Mr. Cardan gallantly.
This time it was the woman who spoke. “I think it would be better,” she
said, “if you slept at our house for the night. You’ll never find the
way. I almost tumbled into the ditch myself just now.” She laughed
shrilly and more loudly, Mr. Cardan thought, at greater length, than was
necessary.
“But have we room?” asked the man in a tone which showed that he was
very reluctant to receive a guest.
“But you know we’ve got room,” the feminine voice answered in a tone of
child-like astonishment. “It’s rough, though.”
“That doesn’t matter in the least,” Mr. Cardan assured her. “I’m most
grateful to you for your offer,” he added, making haste to accept the
invitation before the man could take it back. He had no desire to go
wandering at night among these ditches. Moreover, the prospect of having
company, and odd company, he guessed, was alluring. “Most grateful,” he
repeated.
“Well, if you think there’s room,” said the man grudgingly.
“Of course there is,” the feminine voice replied, and laughed again.
“Isn’t it six spare rooms that we’ve got? or is it seven? Come with us,
Mr. ... Mr. ...”
“Cardan.”
“... Mr. Cardan. We’re going straight home. Such fun,” she added and
repeated her excessive laughter.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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