Artists and patrons -- Fiction; Authors and readers -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Italy -- Fiction; Satire
To-day the Velox had its usual effect on him. At Vezza, when they
started, he was all shyness and submission. He assented meekly to all
the arrangements that Mrs. Aldwinkle made and remade every five minutes,
however contradictory and impossible. He did not venture to suggest that
Irene should come in his car; it was through no good management of his
own, but by the mere luck of Mrs. Aldwinkle’s final caprice before the
actual moment of starting, that he did in fact find her sitting next him
when at last they moved off from before the palace doors. At the back
sat Mr. Falx, in solitude, surrounded by suit-cases. To him Lord
Hovenden had even dutifully promised that he would never go more than
five and twenty miles an hour. Pedestrian slavishness could hardly go
further.
Heavily loaded, Mrs. Aldwinkle’s limousine started first. Miss Elver,
who had begged to be granted this special favour, sat in front, next the
chauffeur. An expression of perfect and absolute bliss irradiated her
face. Whenever the car passed any one by the roadside, she made a shrill
hooting noise and waved her handkerchief. Luckily she was unaware of the
feelings of disgust and indignation which her conduct aroused in the
chauffeur; he was English and enormously genteel, he had the reputation
of his country and his impeccable car to keep up. And this person waved
handkerchiefs and shouted as though she were on a char-à-banc. Miss
Elver even waved at the cows and horses, she shouted even to the cats
and the chickens.
In the body of the car sat Mrs. Aldwinkle, Mrs. Chelifer, Chelifer and
Mr. Cardan. Calamy and Miss Thriplow had decided that they had no time
to go to Rome and had been left—without a word of objection on Mrs.
Aldwinkle’s part—at the palace. The landscape slid placidly past the
windows. Mr. Cardan and Mrs. Chelifer talked about traditional games.
Meanwhile, a couple of hundred yards behind, Lord Hovenden disgustfully
sniffed the dusty air. “How intolerably slowly old Ernest drives!” he
said to his companion.
“Aunt Lilian doesn’t allow him to do more than thirty miles an hour,”
Irene explained.
Hovenden snorted derisively. “Firty! But must we eat veir filthy dust
all ve way?”
“Perhaps you might drop back a bit,” Irene suggested.
“Or perhaps we might pass vem?”
“Well ...” said Irene doubtfully. “I don’t think we ought to make poor
Aunt Lilian eat our dust.”
“She wouldn’t eat it for long, if old Ernest is only allowed to do
firty.”
“Well, in that case,” said Irene, feeling that her duty towards Aunt
Lilian had been done, “in that case....”
Lord Hovenden accelerated. The road was broad, flat and straight. There
was no traffic. In two minutes Mrs. Aldwinkle had eaten her brief,
unavoidable meal of dust; the air was clear again. Far off along the
white road, a rapidly diminishing cloud was all that could be seen of
Lord Hovenden’s Velox.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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