When I saw him in this state, I saw that for the poor man’s sake, as well
as for the public safety, what I had to do for the time was to compose
his mind. Therefore, setting aside all question of reality or unreality
between us, I represented to him that whoever thoroughly discharged his
duty must do well, and that at least it was his comfort that he
understood his duty, though he did not understand these confounding
Appearances. In this effort I succeeded far better than in the attempt
to reason him out of his conviction. He became calm; the occupations
incidental to his post as the night advanced began to make larger demands
on his attention: and I left him at two in the morning. I had offered to
stay through the night, but he would not hear of it.
That I more than once looked back at the red light as I ascended the
pathway, that I did not like the red light, and that I should have slept
but poorly if my bed had been under it, I see no reason to conceal. Nor
did I like the two sequences of the accident and the dead girl. I see no
reason to conceal that either.
But what ran most in my thoughts was the consideration how ought I to
act, having become the recipient of this disclosure? I had proved the
man to be intelligent, vigilant, painstaking, and exact; but how long
might he remain so, in his state of mind? Though in a subordinate
position, still he held a most important trust, and would I (for
instance) like to stake my own life on the chances of his continuing to
execute it with precision?
Unable to overcome a feeling that there would be something treacherous in
my communicating what he had told me to his superiors in the Company,
without first being plain with himself and proposing a middle course to
him, I ultimately resolved to offer to accompany him (otherwise keeping
his secret for the present) to the wisest medical practitioner we could
hear of in those parts, and to take his opinion. A change in his time of
duty would come round next night, he had apprised me, and he would be off
an hour or two after sunrise, and on again soon after sunset. I had
appointed to return accordingly.
Next evening was a lovely evening, and I walked out early to enjoy it.
The sun was not yet quite down when I traversed the field-path near the
top of the deep cutting. I would extend my walk for an hour, I said to
myself, half an hour on and half an hour back, and it would then be time
to go to my signal-man’s box.
Before pursuing my stroll, I stepped to the brink, and mechanically
looked down, from the point from which I had first seen him. I cannot
describe the thrill that seized upon me, when, close at the mouth of the
tunnel, I saw the appearance of a man, with his left sleeve across his
eyes, passionately waving his right arm.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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