Three Men and a MaidWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
Three Men and a Maid
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories
"Chivalrous?" said Bream Mortimer doubtfully. "I don't know that I'd
call it absolutely chivalrous. Of course, all's fair in love and war.
Well, I'm glad you're going to keep my share in the business under your
hat. It might have been awkward meeting him on board."
"You are not likely to meet Eustace on board. He is a very indifferent
sailor and spends most of his time in his cabin."
"That's good! Saves a lot of awkwardness. Well, good-bye."
"Good-bye. When you reach England remember me to your father."
"He won't have forgotten you," said Bream Mortimer confidently. He did
not see how it was humanly possible for anyone to forget this woman.
She was like a celebrated chewing-gum. The taste lingered.
Mrs. Hignett was a woman of instant and decisive action. Even while her
late visitor was speaking schemes had begun to form in her mind like
bubbles rising to the surface of a rushing river. By the time the door
had closed behind Bream Mortimer she had at her disposal no fewer than
seven, all good. It took her but a moment to select the best and
simplest. She tip-toed softly to her son's room. Rhythmic snores
greeted her listening ears. She opened the door and went noiselessly
in.
CHAPTER TWO
The White Star liner _Atlantic_ lay at her pier with steam up and
gangway down ready for her trip to Southampton. The hour of departure
was near and there was a good deal of mixed activity going on. Sailors
fiddled about with ropes. Junior officers flitted to and fro.
White-jacketed stewards wrestled with trunks. Probably the captain,
though not visible, was also employed on some useful work of a nautical
nature and not wasting his time. Men, women, boxes, rugs, dogs, flowers
and baskets of fruit were flowing on board in a steady stream.
The usual drove of citizens had come to see the travellers off. There
were men on the passenger-list who were being seen off by fathers, by
mothers, by sisters, by cousins, and by aunts. In the steerage there was
an elderly Jewish lady who was being seen off by exactly thirty-seven
of her late neighbours in Rivington Street. And two men in the
second cabin were being seen off by detectives, surely the crowning
compliment a great nation can bestow. The cavernous customs shed was
congested with friends and relatives, and Sam Marlowe, heading for the
gang-plank, was only able to make progress by employing all the muscle
and energy which Nature had bestowed upon him, and which during the
twenty-five years of his life he had developed by athletic exercise.
However, after some minutes of silent endeavour, now driving his shoulder
into the midriff of some obstructing male, now courteously lifting some
stout female off his feet, he had succeeded in struggling to within a few
yards of his goal, when suddenly a sharp pain shot through his right arm
and he spun round with a cry.
It seemed to Sam that he had been bitten, and this puzzled him, for New
York crowds, though they may shove and jostle, rarely bite.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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