Three Men and a MaidWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
Three Men and a Maid
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories
"My favorite," said Jane, who for a week had been sitting daily in a
chair in the drawing-room adjoining the table on which the authoress's
complete works were assembled, "is 'The Spreading Light.' I _do_
like 'The Spreading Light!'"
"It was written some years ago," said Mrs. Hignett with something
approaching cordiality, "and I have since revised some of the views I
state in it, but I still consider it quite a good text-book."
"Of course, I can see that 'What of the Morrow?' is more profound,"
said Jane. "But I read 'The Spreading Light' first, and of course that
makes a difference."
"I can quite see that it would," agreed Mrs. Hignett. "One's first step
across the threshold of a new mind, one's first glimpse...."
"Yes, it makes you feel...."
"Like some watcher of the skies," said Mrs. Hignett, "when a new planet
swims into his ken, or like...."
"Yes, doesn't it!" said Jane.
Eustace, who had been listening to the conversation with every muscle
tense, in much the same mental attitude as that of a peaceful citizen in
a Wild West saloon who holds himself in readiness to dive under a table
directly the shooting begins, began to relax. What he had shrinkingly
anticipated would be the biggest thing since the Dempsey-Carpentier
fight seemed to be turning into a pleasant social and literary evening
not unlike what he imagined a meeting of old Vassar alumni must be. For
the first time since his mother had come into the room he indulged in
the luxury of a deep breath.
"But what are you doing here?" asked Mrs. Hignett, returning almost
reluctantly to the main issue.
Eustace perceived that he had breathed too soon. In an unobtrusive way
he subsided into the bed and softly pulled the sheets over his head,
following the excellent tactics of the great Duke of Wellington in his
Peninsular campaign. "When in doubt," the Duke used to say, "retire and
dig yourself in."
"I'm nursing dear Eustace," said Jane.
Mrs. Hignett quivered, and cast an eye on the hump in the bed-clothes
which represented dear Eustace. A cold fear had come upon her.
"'Dear Eustace'!" she repeated mechanically.
"We're engaged," said Jane. "We got engaged this morning. That's how he
sprained his ankle. When I accepted him, he tried to jump a holly-bush."
"Engaged! Eustace, is this true?"
"Yes," said a muffled voice from the interior of the bed.
"And poor Eustace is so worried," continued Jane, "about the house."
She went on quickly. "He doesn't want to deprive you of it, because he
knows what it means to you. So he is hoping--we are both hoping--that
you will accept it as a present when we are married. We really shan't
want it, you know. We are going to live in London. So you will take it,
won't you--to please us?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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