IRIS. I wonder what Father’s up to now?
JACK (_carelessly_). Losing Dad’s money for him, I expect.
IRIS (_seriously_). Jack, you don’t really mean that?
JACK (_laughing_). Of course not, darling. What’s the matter with
giving me some tea? We needn’t wait for Dad. (_To NORAH and RONNY as
they come in_) Come along. You’re just in time.... Ah, now you look
quite nice again, Ronny.
(_They all sit round the tea-things._)
IRIS. What had you been doing to him, Norah?
NORAH. I told him he wasn’t grown-up yet, and he tried to prove he was
by throwing cushions at me.
JACK. That’s a nasty one, Ronny. You’ll have to write to your
solicitors about that.
RONNY. Now, look here, I don’t want any more of it, Norah. I’m older
than you, anyway. And Jack and Iris aren’t exactly bald yet.... What
about that foursome after tea?
IRIS (_doubtfully_). Well, I’m not quite sure if I——
RONNY. If you’re thinking about Mr. Chillingham, he doesn’t want to
play. I asked him.
IRIS (_relieved_). Oh well, then, that’s all right. He wants to wait
for Nancy, I expect. Bless them!
NORAH. I’m not at all sure that I approve of this old-fashioned
sentiment about married life.
JACK. I say, this is rather alarming.
(_BROXOPP comes in, and stands waiting, awkwardly._)
NORAH. Women will never be properly free——
RONNY (_offering plate_). Oh, Lord! have a bun!
NORAH (_taking one_) ——until it is recognised that marriage——
JACK (_seeing BROXOPP_). Hullo, Dad, what luck?
BROXOPP (_sitting in an uncomfortable chair a little way from the
table_). Ah, tea.
JACK. Fish rising?
BROXOPP. They may have risen, Jack, but if so they went back again.
(_Looking at his watch_) The train’s very late. She ought to have been
here by now.
IRIS. There was some mistake about the car, dear. She will be here
directly. (_She gives BROXOPP his tea._)
BROXOPP. Thank you, thank you.
NORAH. I was just saying, Mr. Chillingham, that women will never be
properly free until it is recognised that marriage is only an
intellectual partnership in which both the contracting parties have
equal rights. Of course, I can hardly expect you to agree with me.
BROXOPP (_looking blankly at her_). I’m afraid I——
RONNY. Agree with you? I should think not, indeed. If you knew a
little more about the world——
NORAH. My dear Ronny, the only world that _you_ know is bounded on the
north by Newmarket, on the south by the Savoy, on the east by the
Empire, and on the west by the _Winning Post_.
IRIS. You’ll have to write to your solicitors again, Ronny.
JACK. I say, Norah, you mustn’t say things like that without warning.
Must she, Dad? Bread and butter? (_He offers the plate to BROXOPP, who
takes a piece._)
BROXOPP (_bewildered_). I’m afraid I hardly——Thank you.
IRIS. Was that original, Norah?
NORAH. Perfectly. Why not? I suppose Jack thinks that all the clever
things must be said by men. I don’t know what you feel about it,
Mr. Chillingham——
BROXOPP. I—er——
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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