Through Night to Light: A NovelSpielhagen, Friedrich
General
Through Night to Light: A Novel
Spielhagen, Friedrich
Fiction
Emily threw herself, sobbing, into Oswald's arms. "Oh, let me always
stay with you! let me always stay with you! let me never go back to my
house! I will not see him again! he shall never again touch my hand. I
have never loved him, you know! Oh, Oswald, have pity on me! let me not
suffer so terribly for something I did, after all, but from passionate
love for you!"
"Poor, unhappy child," whispered Oswald, pressing her tenderly to his
heart, "poor unhappy child; and unhappy through me! That is the
bitterest part! Emily, sweet one, dear one, don't cry so! Your sobbing
tears my heart. Leave the man who has already made you so unhappy, and
who can do nothing but make you still unhappier. Forget that you ever
saw him! Go back to your husband! You will not be happy with him; but
who is happy in this world? You will get accustomed to him, as man gets
accustomed to everything at last. And thus the stream of life will roll
on quietly, a little stormy perhaps in the beginning, but gradually
more slowly and lazily, until it falls finally into the Dead Sea of
stolid resignation. Oh God! oh God! Come, Emily, it is of no avail to
pity one another. The night is cold; your hair, your clothes, are as
wet from the falling mist as your face from your tears. You must go
home."
He placed his arm around her waist, and led her back the way they had
come. Emily suffered it all. Her suppressed sobbing ceased after a
while; she seemed to comprehend the helplessness of her situation. But
suddenly, when they had reached the bridge which led out of the park,
she stopped, seized both of Oswald's hands, and said with a low firm
voice:
"I have considered it, and it is so. I will not live without you
henceforth, since I know how glorious life is with you. If you cannot
love me, I conjure you by all that is sacred to you, tell me. I will
not say a word in reply--not a word. I will not cry--not complain. You
shall not be troubled by me. I know what I shall do then."
"Emily!"
"No--let me finish. I tell you I will not live without you. If you do
not love me, it must be a matter of indifference to you what becomes of
me. But if you love me, then you must feel that we must be united in
one way or another. How that can be done, I do not see yet; but I shall
reflect upon it and you will reflect upon it, and we will find a way.
Now tell me: Do you love me? or do you not love me?"
"I love you!" said Oswald; and he really believed at that moment what
he was saying.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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