Through These Eyes: The courageous struggle to find meaning in a life stressed with cancerIsaacson, Lauren Ann
Science
Through These Eyes: The courageous struggle to find meaning in a life stressed with cancer
Isaacson, Lauren Ann
Cancer -- Patients -- Biography; Isaacson, Lauren Ann, 1961-1986
The sleeping arrangement was simple. Age and respect dictated that my
parents sleep on the beds. Since I was a guest, Todd determined that I
should sleep on the couch. My brother was left with the remaining
alternative, which was an inflatable air mattress and a sleeping bag.
The nights brought out humor which came from bizarre circumstances.
Several hours after lying down, Todd's air mattress had deflated to the
point of nonexistence and, bone meeting floor, he had no choice but to
inflate the mattress once again. Slow expirations, sounding akin to a
distant steam engine, would resound into the night. Mom, understanding
what had happened, listened to the steady, "Puff...puff...puff..." and
would have laughed had it not been for the fact that she pitied Todd
and did not wish to waken my dad or myself.
At exactly 4:00 a.m., the church, standing directly beside Todd's
apartment building, would begin a horrid serenade in chimes.
Approximately every other note was sour, yet the noise continued until
the tune was completed. Todd explained that the person who set the
clock mistook the four o'clock a.m. setting for the afternoon
setting...hence the "ungodly" serenade.
A final recollection regarding the overnight occurrences in Todd's
apartment is, admittedly, rather hazy. Having a preoccupation with the
shelves by day, it was no shock to find myself sleep walking to them in
the middle of the night, searching for my pillow. My walk might not
have been discovered by Todd or remembered by me had it not been for
the row of metal canisters which flanked the base of the shelves, for
in my futile search (my pillow had never strayed from the couch), I
bumped my foot into one of the pots, which gonged loudly against a
second and third to create a symphony of echoes. Flustered by the rude
interruption, I nearly woke, and can recall my brother's sleepy, "Is
there something wrong?" to which I mumbled an explanation of my hunt.
The next morning I looked suspiciously at the shelves and was haunted
by a memory for which I could not account and therefore inquired of the
night's events, asking if I had walked in my sleep. "Oh, yeh..., I
couldn't figure out what you were doing!" Todd said.
I reflected over my strange habit and wondered whether I had walked
elsewhere on different occasions, and because I encountered no one, did
not remember or was not informed. It was slightly disconcerting yet
immensely humorous; I only hoped that I would never take a walk which
lead me out of a building, because I remembered the tale of a young man
who, while sleeping, took out the garbage cans and then completed his
slumber on the grass beside the curb. It was a humbling thought, for
although a sleeping individual cannot be responsible for what he says
or does, one's lack of consciousness will not guard the individual from
accompanying embarrassment.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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