Ex-convicts -- Fiction; Love stories; New York (N.Y.) -- Social conditions -- Fiction; Self-sacrifice -- Fiction
All was as fresh, as marvellous, as yesterday. The narrow street was a
bustle of freedom--pounding carts, school-going boys and girls, playing
children, marketing wives--no stripes, no lock-steps, no guards. And the
yellow sun! He held his bleached face up to it, as though he would press
against its sympathetic warmth; and he sucked deeply of the September
air. And the colours!--the reds and whites and browns of the children,
the occasional green of a plant on a window sill, the clear blue of the
strip of sky at the street's top. He had almost forgotten there were
colours other than stripes, the gray of stone walls, the black of steel
bars.
And how calmly the streetful of people took these marvels!
At first he expected the people he threaded among to look into his face,
see his prison record there, draw away from him, perhaps taunt him with
"thief." But no one even noticed him, and gradually this fear began to
fade from him. As he was crossing the Bowery, a car clanged at his back.
He frantically leaped, with a cry, to the sidewalk, and leaned against a
column of the elevated railroad--panting, exhausted, heart pounding. He
had not before known how weak, nerveless, prison had made him.
He found, as he continued his way, that the sidewalk undulated like a
ship's deck beneath his giddy legs; he found himself afraid of
traffic-crowded corners that women and children unhesitatingly crossed;
he found himself stopping and staring with intensest interest at the
common-places of street life--at hurrying men, at darting newsboys, at
rushing street cars and clattering trucks, at whatever moved where it
willed. Old-timers had told him of the dazedness, the fear, the
interest, of the first free days, but he was unprepared for the
palpitant acuteness of his every sensation.
After a time, in Broadway, he chanced to look into a mirror-backed
show-window where luminous satins were displayed. Between two smirking
waxen women in sheeny drapery he saw that which brought him to a pause
and set him gazing. It was his full-length self, which he had not seen
these four years. The figure was gaunt, a mere framework for his shoddy,
prison-made suit; the skin of his face snugly fitted itself to the
bones; his eyes were sunken, large; his hair, which he uncovered, had
here and there a line of gray. He was startled. But he had courage for
the future; and after a few moments he said to himself aloud, a habit
prison had given him: "A few weeks, and you won't know yourself."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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