Ex-convicts -- Fiction; Love stories; New York (N.Y.) -- Social conditions -- Fiction; Self-sacrifice -- Fiction
"And I came for something else," she went on, "I came to assure you of
my friendship, if it can mean anything to you--to tell you how much I
admire your brave and bitter upward struggle. I'd be so happy if there
was some way I could help you, and if you'd let me."
"You want to help me!" was all he could say.
"Yes. Won't you let me--please!"
He throbbed with exultation. "Then you believe I am now honest!"
"You have proved that you are--proved it by the way you have resisted
temptation during these four terrible months."
His eyes suddenly sank from hers to the floor. Her words had brought
back New Year's eve. She had come to him with friendship because she was
certain of his unfallen determination to make his new life an honest
life. If she knew of that night in Allen's house, would she be giving
him this praise, this offer?
The temptation to say nothing rose, but he could not requite frankness
and sincerity such as hers with the lie of silence--he could not accept
her friendship under false pretenses. He looked up and gazed at her
steadily.
"I am innocent where you thought me guilty, but"--he paused; the truth
was hard--"but I am guilty where you think me innocent."
She paled. "What do you mean?" she asked in a fearing voice.
"I have not resisted temptation."
He saw that his words had hurt her, and there was a flash of wonder that
a lapse of his should give her pain. An appeal, full of colour, of
feeling, that would justify himself to her was rising to his lips, but
before it passed them he suddenly felt himself so much the wronged that
his confession came forth an abrupt outline of his acts, spoken with no
shame.
"I had been starved, rebuffed, for over three months. I grew desperate.
Temptation came. I yielded. I entered a house--entered it to steal. But
I did not steal. I could not. I came away with nothing."
He paused. His guilt was out. He awaited her judgment, fearful of her
condemnation, with resentment ready for it if it came.
"Is that all!" she cried.
Vast relief quivered through him. "You mean then that--" He hesitated.
"That you have been fiercely tempted, but you are not guilty."
"You see it so!"
"Yes. Had you conquered temptation on the outer side of the door, you
would certainly have been guiltless. Since you conquered temptation on
the inner side of the door, I cannot see that those few more steps are
the difference between guilt and innocence."
They were both silent a moment.
"But don't you want to tell me something about yourself--about your
plans?" she asked.
The friendship in her voice, in her frank face, warmed him through.
"Certainly," he said. "But there's very little to tell."
He now became aware that all the while they had been standing. "Pardon
my rudeness," he said, and set a chair for her beside the table, and
himself took a chair opposite her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account