From the grave’s edge one looked down over the country-side, green and
hilly, and marked out in meadows by rows of elms, with hedges at foot.
The wind came up briskly and set the dead leaves going again and again,
chasing them among the tombs and casting them into the new red grave.
Bessy was quiet no longer, but sobbed aloud, and Nan May took no more
care to dry her eyes. Johnny made an effort that brought him near to
choking, and then another; and then he fixed his attention on the cows in
a meadow below, counted them with brimming eyes, and named them (for he
knew them well) as accurately as the distance would let him. He would
scarce trust himself to take a last look, with the others, at the coffin
below and its bright tin plate, but fell straightway to watching a man
mending thatch on a barn, and wondering that he wore neither coat nor
waistcoat in such a fresh wind. And so, except for a stray tear or two,
which nobody saw overflow from the brimming eyes, he faced it out, and
walked away with the others under the curious gaze of the neighbours, who
lined up by the path. And Smallpiece went off in the opposite direction
with the carpenter, who carried back the pall folded over his arm, like a
cloak.
The four mourners walked back by the lanes, in silence. Uncle Isaac bore
the restraint with difficulty, and glanced uneasily at Nan May’s face
from time to time, as though he were watching an opportunity to expound
his sentiments at length. But Johnny saw nothing of this, for affliction
was upon him. Now that gran’dad was passed away indeed—was buried, and
the clods were rising quickly over him—now that even the coffin was gone
from the cottage, and would never be seen again—it seemed that he had
never understood before, and he awoke to the full bitterness of things.
More, his effort at restraint was spent, and in the revulsion he found he
could hold in no longer. He peeped into the thickets by the lane-side as
he went, questing for an excuse to drop behind. Seeing no other, he
stooped and feigned to tie his bootlace; calling, in a voice that
quavered absurdly in trying to seem indifferent, “Go on, mother, I’m
comin’ presently!”
He dashed among the bushes, flung himself on the grass, and burst into a
blind fury of tears, writhing as though under a shower of stinging blows.
He had meant to cry quietly, but all was past control, and any might hear
that chanced by. He scarce knew whether the fit had endured for seconds,
minutes, or hours, when he was aware of his mother, sitting beside him
and pressing his bursting head to her breast. Bessy was there too, and
his mother’s arms were round both alike.
With that he grew quieter and quieter still. “We mustn’t break down,
Johnny boy—there’s hard struggles before us,” his mother said, smoothing
back his hair. “An’ you must be very good to me, Johnny, you’re the man
now!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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