Tokyo to Tijuana: Gabriele Departing AmericaSills, Steven David Justin
General
Tokyo to Tijuana: Gabriele Departing America
Sills, Steven David Justin
Fiction
He did not think that he was all that bored. He had around fifteen hours of
classes a week and was able, with that, to gain a salary commensurate to what
he should have received monthly from his former employer. It turned out to be
perfectly legal. After all, he was a Korean citizen, albeit one on a traveler's
visa, and so he did not have to work for anyone but himself. He didn't have to
do all that much but be able to speak English. He went to museums in Seoul on
his free time even though the experience was a bit redundant since there
weren't enough temporary exhibitions to entertain and enlighten him for long.
The period after sex cloyed empty into the night like a finished game of
solitaire. He knew that reality whenever he chose to engage in it and yet he
did it nonetheless. He wanted an exchange of higher and lower energies (or at
least thought he did), but men throughout the world were afraid of anything but
the latter. Reality was as it dictated: and for the most part he did not want
to make a seedy experience into something transformational by exchanging names
and telephone numbers, and making subsequent calls although that was what he
secretly wished-the tattered man that he was.
He entered the mokotong. He picked up a key, a toothbrush, and a razor at the
counter. He took off his shoes and left them with the worker who deposited them
into a small shoe locker; and then he went to his clothes locker. He took off
all of his clothes except for his underwear. He locked them in. Then he went to
the toilet. He put on the typical bathroom slippers made of plastic that were
used in toilets because they were often wet and dirty. He went back, after
urinating, and reopened his locker. He took off his underwear and deposited it
there. He had become so socialized to the need of a beeper (not that he ever
got any calls apart from students needing to re-change their hours of study)
that he hated to keep it there suffocating under his socks. It was an inanimate
object but, instrument that it was, it was a source for possible connectedness.
Like a child, in his more subconscious thoughts, it was his friend. Still,
Koreans, as addicted as they were to pagers and the new popularity of cellular
telephones, could not easily dangle them from their penises at a mokotong. He
locked the locker and felt "Honja" ("alone). Even among large groups of people
he was alone. When he went to restaurants he was usually "honja," and had to
declare it. When he studied Korean, read great literature, went to a museum,
saw a video at the video pang, or went to a mokotang he was alone and often
questioning how anything could be enjoyable in such remoteness. There was pain
in it but like any adaptive mammal choosing one lesser pain to the greater one
(in his case choosing the aloneness of his thoughts to the sociability of the
masses) there were times when he wasn't even aware of how alone he really was.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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