Humorous stories; New York (N.Y.) -- Fiction; Private secretaries -- Fiction
So Buddy is tied up again outside. But it appears to be his day for
doing the wrong thing. Someone has hung Vee's best evenin' wrap out on a
line to air after having a spot cleaned. It's the one with the silver
fox fur on the collar. And it's hung where Buddy can just reach it.
Well, you can guess the rest. Any kind of a fox, deceased or otherwise,
is fair game for Buddy. It's right in his line. And when they discovered
what he was up to there wasn't a piece of that fur collar big enough to
make an ear muff. Parts of the wrap might still be used for polishin'
the silver. Buddy seemed kind of proud of the thorough job he'd made.
Well, Vee had been 'specially fond of that wrap. She'd sort of blown
herself when she got it, and you know how high furs have gone to these
days. I expect she didn't actually weep, but she must have been near it.
And there was Auntie with more stern advice. She points out how a brute
dog with such destructive instincts would go on and on, chewin' up first
one valuable thing and then another, until we'd have nothing left but
what we had on.
Buddy had been tried and found guilty in the first degree. Sentence had
been passed. He must go.
"Perhaps your barber friend will take him back," says Vee. "Or the
Ellinses might want him. Anyway, he's impossible. You must get rid of
him tonight. Only I don't wish to know how, or what becomes of him."
"Very well," says I, "if that's the verdict."
I loads Buddy ostentatious into the little roadster and starts off, with
him wantin' to sit all over me as usual, or else drapin' himself on the
door half-way out of the car. Maybe I stopped at Joe Sarello's, maybe I
only called at the butcher's and collected a big, juicy shin-bone.
Anyway, it was' after dark when I got back and when I came in to dinner
I was alone.
The table chat that evenin' wasn't quite as lively as it generally is.
And after we'd been sitting around in the livin' room an hour or so with
everything quiet, Vee suddenly lets loose with a sigh, which is a new
stunt for her. She ain't the sighin' kind. But there's no mistake about
this one.
"Eh?" says I, lookin' up.
"I--I hope you found him a good home," says she.
"Oh!" says I. "The impossible beast? Probably as good as he deserves."
Then we sat a while longer.
"Little Richard was getting very fond of him," Vee breaks out again.
"Uh-huh," says I.
We went upstairs earlier than usual. There wasn't so much to do about
gettin' ready--no givin' Buddy a last run outside, or makin' him shake a
good night with his paw, or seein' that he had water in his dish.
Nothing but turnin' out the lights. Once, long after Vee should have
been asleep. I thought I heard her snifflin', but I dozed off again
without makin' any remark.
I must have been sawin' wood good and hard, too, when I wakes up to find
her shakin' me by the shoulder.
"Listen, Torchy," she's sayin'. "Isn't that Buddy's bark?"
"Eh? Buddy?" says I. "How could it be?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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