CLOWN.
Marry, sir, they praise me, and make an ass of me. Now my foes tell me
plainly I am an ass: so that by my foes, sir, I profit in the knowledge
of myself, and by my friends I am abused. So that, conclusions to be as
kisses, if your four negatives make your two affirmatives, why then,
the worse for my friends, and the better for my foes.
DUKE.
Why, this is excellent.
CLOWN.
By my troth, sir, no; though it please you to be one of my friends.
DUKE.
Thou shalt not be the worse for me; there’s gold.
CLOWN.
But that it would be double-dealing, sir, I would you could make it
another.
DUKE.
O, you give me ill counsel.
CLOWN.
Put your grace in your pocket, sir, for this once, and let your flesh
and blood obey it.
DUKE.
Well, I will be so much a sinner to be a double-dealer: there’s
another.
CLOWN.
_Primo, secundo, tertio_, is a good play, and the old saying is, the
third pays for all; the triplex, sir, is a good tripping measure; or
the bells of Saint Bennet, sir, may put you in mind—one, two, three.
DUKE.
You can fool no more money out of me at this throw. If you will let
your lady know I am here to speak with her, and bring her along with
you, it may awake my bounty further.
CLOWN.
Marry, sir, lullaby to your bounty till I come again. I go, sir, but I
would not have you to think that my desire of having is the sin of
covetousness: but as you say, sir, let your bounty take a nap, I will
awake it anon.
[_Exit Clown._]
Enter Antonio and Officers.
VIOLA.
Here comes the man, sir, that did rescue me.
DUKE.
That face of his I do remember well.
Yet when I saw it last it was besmear’d
As black as Vulcan, in the smoke of war.
A baubling vessel was he captain of,
For shallow draught and bulk unprizable,
With which such scathful grapple did he make
With the most noble bottom of our fleet,
That very envy and the tongue of loss
Cried fame and honour on him. What’s the matter?
FIRST OFFICER.
Orsino, this is that Antonio
That took the _Phoenix_ and her fraught from Candy,
And this is he that did the _Tiger_ board
When your young nephew Titus lost his leg.
Here in the streets, desperate of shame and state,
In private brabble did we apprehend him.
VIOLA.
He did me kindness, sir; drew on my side,
But in conclusion, put strange speech upon me.
I know not what ’twas, but distraction.
DUKE.
Notable pirate, thou salt-water thief,
What foolish boldness brought thee to their mercies,
Whom thou, in terms so bloody and so dear,
Hast made thine enemies?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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