_Clo._ Well, I'll put it on, and I will dissemble myself in't; and I would I were the first that ever dissembled in such a gown. _Enter_ SIR TOBY _and_ MARIA. _Sir To._ Jove bless thee, master parson. _Clo._ _Bonos dies_, Sir Toby: for as the old hermit of Prague, that never saw pen and ink, very wittily said to a niece of King Gorboduc, _That, that is, is_; so I, being master parson, am master parson: For what is that, but that? and is, but is? _Sir To._ To him, Sir Topas. _Clo._ [_Opens the door of an inner Room_] What, hoa, I say,--Peace in this prison! _Sir To._ The knave counterfeits well; a good knave. _Mal._ [_In the inner Room._] Who calls there? _Clo._ Sir Topas, the curate, who comes to visit Malvolio the lunatic. _Mal._ Sir Topas, Sir Topas, good Sir Topas, go to my lady. _Clo._ Out, hyperbolical fiend! how vexest thou this man? talkest thou nothing but of ladies? _Sir To._ Well said, master parson. _Mal._ Sir Topas, never was man thus wrong'd; good Sir Topas, do not think I am mad; they have bound me, hand and foot, and laid me here in hideous darkness. _Clo._ Say'st thou, that house is dark? _Mal._ As hell, Sir Topas. _Clo._ Madman, thou errest: I say, there is no darkness, but ignorance; in which thou art more puzzled, than the Egyptians in their fog. _Mal._ I say this house is as dark as ignorance, though ignorance were as dark as hell; and I say, there was never man thus abused: I am no more mad than you are; make the trial of it in any constant question. _Clo._ What is the opinion of Pythagoras concerning wild-fowl? _Mal._ That the soul of our grandam might haply inhabit a bird. _Clo._ What thinkest thou of his opinion? _Mal._ I think nobly of the soul, and no way approve his opinion. _Clo._ Fare thee well: Remain thou still in darkness: thou shalt hold the opinion of Pythagoras, ere I will allow of thy wits; and fear to kill a woodcock, lest thou dispossess the soul of thy grandam. Fare thee well. _Mal._ Sir Topas, Sir Topas,-- _Sir To._ My most exquisite Sir Topas,-- _Clo._ Nay, I am for all waters. [_Takes off the gown and hood, and gives them to_ MARIA.] _Mar._ Thou might'st have done this without thy hood and gown; he sees thee not. _Sir To._ To him in thine own voice, and bring us word how thou find'st him: Come by and by to my chamber. [_Exeunt_ SIR TOBY _and_ MARIA. _Clo._ [_Sings._] _Hey Robin, jolly Robin, Tell me how thy lady does._ _Mal._ Fool,--fool,--good fool,-- _Clo._ Who calls, ha? _Mal._ As ever thou wilt deserve well at my hand, help me to a candle, and pen, ink, and paper; as I am a gentleman, I will live to be thankful to thee for't. _Clo._ Master Malvolio! _Mal_. Ay, good fool. _Clo._ Alas, sir, how fell you besides your five wits?