“To illustrate, look back along the ages and see that poor man there, bending over the stone mortar, pulverizing the fluidy grains into a more minute form. Watch him. See. He stops and gazes at yonder precipitous torrent thundering down a rocky channel in its course. There, a thought has struck him. He begins to whistle, and then to whittle, for he learned to whistle soon after he learned to breathe. “His hands are clumsy, but brains furnish skill, and practice makes perfect. He gears together a dozen wooden wheels, some horizontal, some perpendicular, and makes a mortar, such as he had never seen before that moment of inspiration. He turns on the water. The wheel revolves. The mortar grinds, and out rolls the meal in a golden stream, while he claps his hands in triumph, and thinks what the machine would do if it were a thousand times stronger. “Therefore, remember, gentlemen, I am not conscientiously, virtuously, righteously nor religiously, but just good naturedly, giving these goods away. “Here is this watch, now; a fine Elgin, with a twenty-year case set in two plates of gold, adjusted to both heat and cold, with economical hair spring, regulated by sun, moon and stars, and it will even tell you the price of cheese in Canada. I’m not going to force you to take it at this moment, and as no one seems ready to make a decent bid I’ll lay it by until the gang gets in from the railroad, and switch off on to this elegant suit of underwear. “How much am I offered to start it, the choice with the privilege? Remember, these garments are all wool, through and through, double-hitched and double-stitched, ribbed up and down, as perfectly seamless as the leg of a woman’s stocking, and guaranteed to live three years without washing. The winter days are fast coming on, when underwear will be more precious than diamonds, and the tariff will send prices up a-booming. Take a pair of these drawers homeland after wearing them all winter you can sneak around to some dressmaker in the spring, and she can fix them so the old woman can wear them next summer. Now, don’t all bid at once. Yes, yes, I’m listening. That’s right. Keep it up. You can’t all have this one pair, and they go to that man over there, cheap as dirt and good as gold. Here’s another suit. Shall we start them where the other left off—and who speaks first?”