MRS. F. Why you know that window looks upon the river.
EUCLID. (_aside._) I should rather think I did know it. La, so it
does, ha! ha! He could not get out of the window without tumbling into
the wa--ter. Ha! ha! Oh-h-h!
MRS. F. But I'll go and see after Julia; for if the mad headed couple
should meet, I dread the consequences. Be sure you do not tell Mr.
Holdfast, if he comes home, there was a man in the basket.
[_Exit, R. H._
EUCLID. No, I shall not betray the secret. Here's a pretty kettle of
fish! here's a nice business! I turned _Noyade_;--Oh, but it's
over--yes, over! I won't think about it. What business had a man in
that basket? I'll be comfortable; it was not my fault. I'll
read--divert my mind with study. "Hydrostatics--to find the specific
gravity of bodies, immerse the body in water." Curse Hydrostatics!
_Enter FANNY, L._
Oh, you are here, are you? You are a pretty article.
FANNY. Well, so all the men say.
EUCLID. How can you look at me with that confounded smirk, you
abandoned woman?
FANNY. Sir! do you mean to say I'm--
EUCLID. No--you are a damned deal worse; you are an accessory before
the fact.
FANNY. What fact?
EUCLID. An enormous fact--murder!
FANNY. Oh, Mr. Facile! Ha! ha! you are joking.
EUCLID. Joking, eh! It's all very fine for you to pretend you didn't
know a man was in that basket.
FANNY. Oh, a very fine trick. Ah, no, you are in fun; there was a note
tied; I have it in my pocket. (_pulls it out._) There, sir; pardon me
blushing if it says anything soft.
EUCLID. (_reading._) "Dear Fan--
FANNY. Deceitful wretch!
EUCLID. "Inclosed herewith you have my master."
FANNY. (_screams._) Oh!
EUCLID. Don't scream--don't scream! We shall be hanged if you scream.
FANNY. Oh, dear! oh, dear, oh, dear! Let me look; m-a-s, mas--t-e-r,
ter--master. It's right--oh, dear! oh, dear! (_sobs._) we're in a
pickle!
EUCLID. Yes, and so is our unfortunate victim. Then you did not know
it?
FANNY. No; you know I cannot read without help. I determined to throw
that wretch's presents out of the window. I was only thinking of the
present.
EUCLID. Ay, but I'm thinking of the future; I did you wrong. I see you
are innocent. We are both a couple of innocent--guilty, miserable
wretches. Why didn't you throw it in yourself? We'll finish this
letter though.
(_they stand close together, reading a letter._
_Enter RECKLESS, R._
RECK. (_aside._) I can't find Julia anywhere; and I dread every minute
lest I should meet some cursed person or other who might be more
curious than pleasant. Who's that? Bless my lucky stars! my old
friend Facile. I can't be mistaken. (_slaps on back._) Facile, my boy!
EUCLID. (_aside._) That's the constable. No, sir, not here; it came
from the window next door. What, Reckless! Ah, how do you do?
(_aside._) Where the deuce did he come from?
RECK. I won't say a word about the basket; I'll feign I called to see
him. How do you do, my boy? We have not seen one another these--
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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