Ghosts -- Fiction; Invalids -- Fiction; Women authors -- Fiction
“It would make everything so right. I have been thinking of this ever
since you began to get better, before, too. You will always be delicate,
need a certain amount of care. No one could give it to you as well as I.
Why not? I have almost the best practice in Pineland, and I deserve it,
too. I’ve worked hard in these eleven years. I’ve given an honest
scientific trial to every new treatment. I’ve saved scores of lives....”
“Your own in jeopardy all the time.”
“She asked me to do it, begged me to do it....” He spoke wildly.
“Gabriel Stanton was inflexible, the marriage was to be postponed whilst
Mrs. Roope was prosecuted, or the case fought out in the Law Courts. And
every little anxiety or excitement set her poor heart beating ... put
her in pain ... jeopardised her life. I’d do it again tomorrow. I don’t
care who knows. You’ll have to tell if you want to. If you married me
you couldn’t give evidence against me....”
His smile startled me; it was strange, cunning. It seemed to say, “See
how clever I am,—I have thought of everything.”
“There, I have had that in my mind ever since you began to be better.”
“It was not because you have fallen in love with me, then?” I scoffed.
“When you are Margaret, I love you ... I adore you.” The whole secret
flashed on me then, flashed through his strange perfervid eyes. We were
in full view of a curious housemaid at a window, but he kneeled down by
my couch, as he had kneeled by Margaret’s.
“You are Margaret. Tell me the truth. There is no other fellow now. You
always said if it were not for Gabriel Stanton....”
I quieted him with difficulty. I saw what was the matter. Of course I
ought to have seen it before, but vanity and Ella obscured the truth.
The poor fellow’s mind was unhinged. For years he had brooded and
brooded, yet worked magnificently at his profession, worked at making
amends. The place and I had brought out the latent mischief. Now he
implored me to marry him, to show him I was glad he had carried out my
wishes.
“Your heart is now quite well ... I have sounded it over and over again.
You will never have a return of those pains. _Margaret...._”
I got rid of him that day as quickly as possible, not answering yes or
no definitely, marking time, soothing him disingenuously. Before the
next day was at its meridian I had hurriedly left Carbies. Left
Pineland, all the strange absorbing story, and this poor obsessed
doctor. I left a letter for him, the most difficult piece of prose I
have ever written. I was writing to a madman to persuade him he was
sane! I gave urgent reasons for being in London, added a few lines, that
I hoped he would understand, about having abandoned my intention of
turning my morphia dreams into “copy”; tried to convey to him that he
had nothing to fear from me....
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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