It is probable that the influence which Uffington had quietly and
inexplicably acquired over her contributed a great deal to this
result. That influence, always exercised for her good, without any
special or direct application, without the remotest possibility of
wounding her, even at her most sensitive times, was exerted in
destroying the baleful influence of her bringing-up and her previous
surroundings, and in endeavouring to induce her to take a healthier,
quieter, and broader view of life. The peculiar circumstances which
had overshadowed Uffington's existence at an early period of what
looked to be a very promising career had not indeed made him 'kindly
with his kind,' had not opened any well of gushing sentiment and
rendered him generally philanthropic. On the contrary, among his
friends the fountain of his feelings was supposed to be frozen over,
and it was certain that, towards the majority of his acquaintance--he
never could allow to himself that any one had further intimacy with
him--he maintained a sufficiently icy exterior; but there was
something in May Forestfield which touched him far more deeply than he
would have admitted or than he would have liked to be known.
On the first night of his seeing her, when Tom Lydyeard had pointed
her out at the Opera, he felt an odd kind of interest in her, such as
for years no human being had awakened in him; an interest which was
strengthened when he learned that she was the daughter of the woman
who had patronised his youth and offered to stand by him when the rest
of the world turned their backs. Nor was this interest lessened when
he learnt of the folly and sin which she had committed; crimes
comparatively roughly venial in his eyes, which had seen greater
wrong-doing far less visited. His experience had taught him that the
critical time of all others was when the consequences of discovery
first began to be felt, when all fear of the past or for the future
was merged in the desperation of the present, and when, a fatal
recklessness taking possession of the soul, all chance of restoration
to a healthy tone was in the highest degree imperilled. Nor had the
fact of having made her personal acquaintance in the manner already
shown lessened Uffington's interest in May Forestfield. He found her
mentally much weaker than he had anticipated; a mere child drifting
hither and thither under stress of the winds of circumstance, unstable
and almost purposeless; but he recognised in an instant that it was
owing to this mental weakness, to this indecision and want of force of
character, that she had become what she was--a deserted woman, a
proscribed wife, without even the poor satisfaction of feeling that
she had deeply loved and been deeply loved by the man for whose sake
she had fallen.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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