Mrs. Nugent lingered a little with the others in the great relief and
ease of mind which, though it was only momentary, was great. She had not
after all been obliged to reveal any of her secrets, whatever they might
be. If he had been less peremptory, more reasonable, she would have been
obliged to explain to him; and that she had very little mind to do.
After the first relief, however, she began to feel what a blow had been
struck at her temporary comfort in this place by so untoward an
accident. His mother and sister were her chief friends; they had
received her so generously, so kindly, with such confidence. Her secret
was no guilty one, but still it had made her uncomfortable, it had been
the subject of various annoyances; but none of these kind people had
asked her any questions; they had received her for herself, never
doubting. And now it seemed that she had only appeared among them to do
harm. She was a pretty and attractive young woman, and not altogether
unaware that people liked her on that account; but yet she never had
been one of those women with whom everybody is acquainted, in novels, at
least, before whom every man falls down. She had had her share, but she
had not been persecuted by inopportune lovers. And she had not
entertained any alarm in respect to Mr. Wradisley. She hoped now that
his pride would help him through it, and that nobody would be the wiser;
but still she could not continue here under the very wing of the family
after so humiliating its head, either meeting him, or compelling him to
avoid her. She went on turning over this question in her mind, pausing
to talk to this one and that one, to do her duty to Mrs. Wradisley still
by amusing and occupying her guests, putting on her smiles as if they
had been ribbons to conceal some little spot or rent beneath. Indeed,
it was no rent. She had not been very long at Wradisbury. It would be no
dreadful business to go away. She was neither without friends nor
protectors, and London was always a ready and natural refuge, where it
would be so simple to go. But this fiasco, as she called it to herself,
vexed her. She wanted to get away as soon as possible, to think it over
at leisure, to find Tiny, who no doubt was hanging on Lucy Wradisley’s
skirts somewhere, or else playing with the other children, and to steal
home as soon as there was any pretext for departure. She felt that she
would prefer not to meet his mother’s eye.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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