He went straight on toward the gate and the village, not much thinking
where he was going, nor meaning anything in particular by it; but
before he was aware found himself at Greenbank, where he had stopped
once in the darkness, all unaware who was within, and listened to Ralph
Wradisley (the cad! his brother was right) bringing forth his foolish
rubbish about the pretty widow, confound him! And some one had asked him
if perhaps he knew the Nugents, and he had said, Yes; but they were old
people. Yes, he knew some Nugents, he had said. They had only been her
grandparents, that was all. It was her mother’s name she had taken, but
he never guessed it, never divined it, though Tiny had divined it when
she suddenly grew silent in his hands and gave him that look. Tiny had
recognized him, like a shot! Though she had never seen him, though she
was only five weeks old when--But he had not known her, had not known
anything, nor how to behave himself when Providence placed such an
unlooked for chance in his hands.
He went up to the house, the door of which stood wide open, and went in.
All the doors were open with a visible emptiness, and that look of mute
disorder and almost complaint which a deserted house bears when its
inmates have gone away. A woman came out of the back regions on hearing
his step, and explained that she had acted as Mrs. Nugent’s cook, but
was the caretaker put in by the landlord, and let or not with the house
as might suit the inmate. Mrs. Nugent had behaved very handsome to her,
she said, with wages and board wages, and to Lizzie too, the housemaid,
who had gone back to her mother’s, and refused to stay and help to clean
out the house. It was out of order, as Mrs. Nugent only went last night;
but if the gentleman would like to see over it--Bertram behaved handsome
to her also, bidding her not trouble herself, and then was permitted to
wander through the house at his will. There was nothing to be seen
anywhere which had any association either to soothe or hurt his excited
mind--a broken doll, an old yellow novel, a chair turned over in one
room, the white coverlet in another twisted as if packing of some sort
had been performed upon it--nothing but the merest vulgar traces of a
sudden going away. In the little drawing-room there were some violets in
water in a china cup--he remembered that she had worn them
yesterday--and by their side and on the carpet beneath two or three of
the forget-me-nots he had gathered for Tiny. He had almost thought of
taking some of the violets (which was folly) away with him. But when he
saw the forget-me-nots he changed his mind, and left them as he found
them. His flowers had not found favor in her sight, it appeared! It was
astonishing how much bitterness that trivial circumstance added to his
feelings. He went out by the open window, relieved to get into the open
air again, and went round and round the little garden, finding here and
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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