"By Jove, didn't she look well! Never seen anything like it in my
life, and I've seen a few good-looking girls. Miss Gordon wasn't in it
with her, and Miss G. isn't a bad-looking girl. But that beautiful,
pale, sad, round face, and her eyes--her soft sad eyes! As some fellow
put it, she 'is as pure as the saints on high, and never was saint so
fair.' But I'm not a poet. I don't think like a poet; I don't look
like a poet; I don't eat or drink like a poet. I suppose, as there is
the seed of every disease in man, there's the seed of poetry in me.
Where they put the blessed seed I don't know. What's the good of a
seed that's in some cupboard if you don't know which, and when only
four out of eight of the keys you have fit the locks? It's
discouraging. I suppose every fellow thinks of poetry when he sees a
face like hers. I wonder if a member of the London board of actuaries
saw a face like that, what kind of poetry would he think of. Maybe he
wouldn't think of poetry at all. Perhaps he'd try to estimate the
superficial area of her face, allowing of course for the eyes. If I
knew any figure-painter, I think I'd ask him to paint her and me as
Psyche and Adonis. I'd get up an appropriate expression like this," he
said to himself, throwing away the butt of his cigar, contorting his
face until he was positively hideous, and then approaching the glass
with a burlesque mincing gait. When he saw his reflection in the glass
he laughed aloud. Then he undressed, put out the light, and went to
bed.
The woman still was up. She sat by the window of her bedroom. Her eyes
were fixed on the cloudlike mass of St. Paul's towering above her. She
was not thinking of St. Paul's. She was not thinking of London. She
was not thinking of George Osborne.
She had been to a concert that night, and she had heard a song often
heard and sung by her before. It was a well-known song, a well-known
air. It had never touched her until to-night. The music had reached
some range of feeling, or emotion, or spirituality, of which she had
had no previous acquaintance. While she listened she was conscious of
some mighty upheaval of her nature. She saw all her past life by a new
light, and she shrank back from the vague possibilities of what was to
come. She could understand nothing of this change. She heard the
rumble of some noble thought, but could not figure to her mind its
appearance. She knew something great was at hand. She could not think
of lying down. She must wait for what was coming, be it what it might.
Hours went by, and still she did not move.
Still she had the words of that refrain, the tone of the singer's
voice, the rumble of the approaching revelation. Yet the revelation
did not come.
Hours again went by without change. She was unconscious of fatigue,
unconscious there was cause for fatigue, unconscious of everything but
the powers that kept her spell-bound.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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