‘I know,’ chimed in another. ‘I went down the boat before she shoved off to try and get a drink out of him, but when I got there the cupboard was bare.’ ‘By the way, aren’t they back yet?’ ‘Don’t think so. You’d hear ’em quick enough if they were. They do seem to be a bit late. Probably strafed a Hun.’ ‘If they’d done that they’d be back at the double. They hadn’t anything to celebrate it with.’ ‘Can’t help their troubles, and if we don’t want to be late for dinner we’d better get moving,’ and, snatching his cap from a pile on the table, the speaker linked arms with a couple of cronies and waltzed out of the room. ‘My opinion,’ said the Torpedo Lieutenant to a circle of boat captains gathered round the fireplace, ‘is that you fellows take life too seriously. Look at me. I work all day. I’m a fine figure of a man.... Now, then, no rude remarks, please. And I come in here in the evening as merry as a cricket.’ ‘That’s all right,’ replied one of his listeners. ‘It all depends on one’s definition of the word work. You ought to look it up; you’d find it instructive.’ ‘Your pardon, sir. My labours are long and strenuous. I went down three boats to-day and gave my valuable advice on Mark XX torpedoes. But alas! this is a thankless world. I received recompense in only two. The other boat had lost her corkscrew.’ ‘Say, Boyd,’ cried a voice at the other end of the room, ‘how did the gyro behave last trip?’ ‘A 1. I’m becoming a perfect knut at it. He only rang once. I’ve come to the conclusion that when you know the elements of its construction, it’s as easy as falling off a log. Yes, a cocktail, please, waiter. I had some trouble at first though, but that was my own fault. In fact I composed a song entitled “When the Sperry bell is ringing.”’ ‘Mine’s jolly fine now, never makes a murmur.’ ‘When you’re quite finished your harangue on work, a subject on which you are grossly ignorant, Torps, perhaps you will pay a little attention to me.’ The voice was Raymond’s. ‘Now, tell me why. Why am I to listen to your fatuous and narrow-minded remarks on a topic that is not only entirely distasteful to me at all times, but altogether beyond the pale at this hour of the evening.’ ‘My fatuous remark, as you are pleased to call it, was about to take the form of asking you to have a gin with me, but seeing that----’ ‘Kamerad, kamerad. I apologise--for once you talk as a Christian should. Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend him your ears. He’s going to do the decent. I can feel it coming on.’ ‘At one time, in my palmy days, when I was your age,’ said Raymond, raising his glass, ‘I could go a whole pint of beer without swallowing. But now---- It’s a bit ’ard. Cheer-oh, everybody.’ In the train of the drinks came the Marine servants bearing the table-cloths and silver, and a general move was made for the door.