Morton looked at his companion not without a certain sense of victory.
He saw that he had gained, for the moment at least, an influence over
her, and roused her to the expression of feelings to which, perhaps,
she had never given utterance before. Yet his own mind was any thing
but tranquil. Something more than admiration was stirring within him.
He felt impelled to explore farther the proud spirit which had already
yielded up to him some of its secrets. But he felt that, with her eyes
upon him, he could not speak without committing himself farther than
he was prepared to do. In this dilemma he determined to retreat--a
resolution for which he was entitled to no little credit, if its merit
is to be measured by the effort it cost him. He rose from his seat.
"Find your star, Fanny, and you may challenge the world. But I see
people coming down the garden towards us. We shall be invaded if we
stay here. Let us walk back towards the house."
When he found himself alone again, he paced his room in no very
enviable frame of mind.
"What devil impelled me to speak as I did? It was no part of mine to
be telling her of her faults. Am I turning philanthropist and
busybody? If I wished to gain her heart, I suspect I have been taking
the right course. What with any other lady would have been intolerable
presumption and arrogance, is the most effectual way to win her
esteem. And why should I not wish to gain her heart? There is good
there in abundance, if one could but depend on it. No; I am not
blinded yet. This last outburst was a momentary impulse, like all the
rest; and to-morrow she will be reckless as ever. She delights in
lawlessness, and rejoices in the zest of breaking established bounds.
Her wayward will is like a cataract, and may carry her, God knows
whither. No; I will not walk in this path; I will not try to marry
her. Her heart is untouched--that is clear as the day. I wish she
could say as much of mine. I will leave this place to-morrow, cost
what it will."
A letter from Boston gave him a pretext; and bidding farewell to his
cousin and her mother, he took the early train homewards. The newsboy
brought him a paper, and his eyes rested on the columns; but his
thoughts centred on Fanny Euston and his last evening's conversation
with her at the foot of the garden.
CHAPTER XIV.
* * * One fire burns out another's burning,
One pain is lessened by another's anguish;
Turn giddy, and be holp by backward turning;
One desperate grief cures with another's languish.
Take thou some new infection to thine eye,
And the rank poison of the old will die.--_Romeo and Juliet_.
All day the train whirled along, and Morton's troubled thoughts found
no rest.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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