"That's all right! So that's settled. Have you written that thing about
the Race? I'm so frightfully interested. You must get it finished very
quickly and come and see us, Johannes. The hour of love, wasn't that
it? And a lovely papal robe with folds, and a rosy red night; heavens,
how well I remember what you told me about it. I haven't been here
so often lately, but now I'm going to come every day to hear whether
you've finished."
"I shall soon have finished," he said, still looking at her.
"Today I fetched your books and took them into my own room. I wanted to
read them over again; it won't tire me the least, I'm looking forward
to it. Look here, Johannes, you might be so kind as to see me home; I
don't know whether it's quite safe for me all the way home. I don't
know. Perhaps there's somebody waiting for me outside here, somebody
walking up and down perhaps...." Suddenly she burst into tears and
stammered: "I called him a storyteller, I didn't mean to say that. I'm
sorry I said it. He hasn't told me lies, on the contrary he was all
the time.... We're going to have some friends on Tuesday, but he's not
coming, but _you_ must come, do you hear? Will you promise? But all the
same I didn't want to say anything bad about him. I don't know what you
think of me...."
He answered:
"I am beginning to understand you."
She threw herself on his neck, hid her face on his breast, trembling
with agitation.
"Oh, but I'm fond of you too," she exclaimed. "You mustn't think
anything else. I don't love only him, it isn't so bad as that. When
you asked me last year I was so glad; but now he has come. I don't
understand it. Is it so awful of me, Johannes? Perhaps I love him a
tiny bit more than you; I can't help it, it has come over me. O dear,
I haven't slept for several nights since I saw him and I love him more
and more. What am I to do? You are so much older, you must tell me. He
walked here with me, he's standing outside waiting to see me home again
and now perhaps he's cold. Do you despise me, Johannes? I haven't
kissed him; no, I haven't, you must believe me; I've only given him my
rose. Why don't you answer, Johannes? You must tell me what I'm to do,
for I can't bear it any longer."
Johannes sat quite still and listened to her. He said:
"I have nothing to answer."
"Thanks, thanks, dear Johannes, it is so good of you not to be wild
with me," she said, drying her tears. "But you mustn't think I'm not
fond of you too. Goodness! I shall come and see you much oftener than I
have done and do everything you want. But the only thing is that it's
he I'm more fond of. It wasn't my doing. It's not my fault."
He got up in silence, put his hat on and said:
"Shall we go?"
They went downstairs.
Outside stood Richmond. He was a dark-haired young man with brown eyes
that sparkled with youth and life. The frost had reddened his cheeks.
"Are you cold?" said Camilla, flying up to him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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