Captain Broughton, as he walked back to Oxney Colne, made up his mind
that he would say nothing on the matter to his aunt till the next
morning. He wanted to think over it all, and to think it over, if
possible, by himself. He had taken a step in life, the most important
that a man is ever called on to take, and he had to reflect whether or
no he had taken it with wisdom.
'Have you seen her?' said Miss Le Smyrger, very anxiously, when he came
into the drawing-room.
'Miss Woolsworthy you mean,' said he. 'Yes, I've seen her. As I found
her out I took a long walk and happened to meet her. Do you know, aunt,
I think I'll go to bed; I was up at five this morning, and have been on
the move ever since.'
Miss Le Smyrger perceived that she was to hear nothing that evening, so
she handed him his candlestick and allowed him to go to his room.
But Captain Broughton did not immediately retire to bed, nor when he
did so was he able to sleep at once. Had this step that he had taken
been a wise one? He was not a man who, in worldly matters, had allowed
things to arrange themselves for him, as is the case with so many men.
He had formed views for himself, and had a theory of life. Money for
money's sake he had declared to himself to be bad. Money, as a
concomitant to things which were in themselves good, he had declared to
himself to be good also. That concomitant in this affair of his
marriage, he had now missed. Well; he had made up his mind to that, and
would put up with the loss. He had means of living of his own, though
means not so extensive as might have been desirable. That it would be
well for him to become a married man, looking merely to that state of
life as opposed to his present state, he had fully resolved. On that
point, therefore, there was nothing to repent. That Patty Woolsworthy
was good, affectionate, clever, and beautiful, he was sufficiently
satisfied. It would be odd indeed if he were not so satisfied now,
seeing that for the last four months he had declared to himself daily
that she was so with many inward asseverations. And yet though he
repeated now again that he was satisfied, I do not think that he was so
fully satisfied of it as he had been throughout the whole of those four
months. It is sad to say so, but I fear--I fear that such was the case.
When you have your plaything how much of the anticipated pleasure
vanishes, especially if it have been won easily!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account