Marriage -- Fiction; Virginia -- Fiction; Wives -- Fiction; Women -- Fiction
pile of coal into a flame. She was alone in her despair, and she
realized, with a feeling of terror, that one is always alone when one
despairs, that there is a secret chamber in every soul where neither
love nor sympathy can follow one. If Oliver were here beside her--if he
were standing close to her in that throbbing circle around the bed--she
would still be separated from him by the immensity of that inner space
which is not measured by physical distances. "No, even if he were here,
he could not reach me," she said, and an instant later, with one of
those piercing illuminations which visit even perfectly normal women in
moments of great intensity, she thought quickly, "If every woman told
the truth to herself, would she say that there is something in her which
love has never reached?" Then, reproaching herself because she had left
the bed for a minute, she went back again and bent over the unconscious
child, her whole slender body curving itself passionately into an
embrace. His face was ashen white, except where the skin around his
mouth was discoloured with a faint bluish tinge. His flesh, even his
bones, appeared to have shrunk almost away in twenty-four hours. It was
impossible to imagine that he was the rosy, laughing boy, who had
crawled into her arms only two nights ago. The disease held him like
some unseen spiritual enemy, against which all physical weapons were as
useless as the little toys of a child. How could one fight that sinister
power which had removed him to an illimitable distance while he was
still in her arms? The troubled stupor, which had in it none of the
quiet and the restfulness of sleep, terrorized her as utterly as if it
had been the personal spirit of evil. The invisible forces of Life and
Death seemed battling in the quivering air within that small circle of
light.
While she bent over him, he stirred, raised himself, and then fell back
in a paroxysm of coughing. The violence of the spasm shook his fragile
little body as a rough wind shakes a flower on a stalk. Over his face
the bluish tinge spread like a shadow, and into his eyes there came the
expression of wondering terror which she had seen before only in the
eyes of young startled animals. For an instant it seemed almost as if
the devil of disease were wrestling inside of him, as if the small
vital force she called life would be beaten out in the struggle. Then
the agony passed; the strangling sound ceased, and he grew quiet, while
she wiped the poison from his mouth and nostrils, and made him swallow a
few drops of milk out of a teaspoon.
At the moment, while she fell on her knees by his bedside, it seemed to
her that she had reached that deep place beyond which there is nothing.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account