Voices; Birth-Marks; The Man and the ElephantHolt, Mathew Joseph
History
Voices; Birth-Marks; The Man and the Elephant
Holt, Mathew Joseph
Kentucky -- Fiction; Kentucky -- History
“As soon as you can get away from your school and leave your
grandmother, if she will not come too, come and see me. I must have some
one to talk with about John; some one whom he knew and loved. When I try
it with his father, he rushes from the room. John was an only child—now
I am childless.
“He claimed to have seen you before he died, saying: ‘Mother, I have
just seen Jeannette; she is very beautiful.’ Then he described you. I
believe he really saw; and if his description fits, you can help me now.
You were sitting on the Big Rock by the creek. It was the night of the
fourth of June. I can write no more.
“John’s mother,
“Mary R. Allen.”
Jeannette had always felt that her life, which she knew was a silent,
empty and colorless one without, was gloriously full and lit up within
by a mystical treasure, which in some way she had stumbled upon and
appropriated. She had soul companions who spoke to her with voices she
alone could hear; that told of things in her own and other people’s
lives, that she and they might know, if they would but listen. She had
lived a soul life; and it had a far-flung horizon.
When she received Mrs. Allen’s letter telling of the death of her son,
who had been her one friend around whom her childlike super-idealism and
innocence had built a gorgeous bower, her heart was rent by its first
great shock. She felt that her God of providence and love had cast her
from heaven into a place of utter darkness where she had been caught by
the net of fate and was now being dragged through all the sorrows and
tragedies of life. Her voices were gone; she hated the silence about
her; the mountain seemed dark and dangerous; the sun seemed harsh and
cold; the grass but to cover graves; and the trees but mourners for the
departed. He is gone! God has deserted me! She had yet to learn that the
voices would return; that other friends would come; that life is neither
tragic nor sad, though it has its hours of sadness and tragedy; and that
sorrows make for themselves deep beds in our hearts wherein they sleep
until life draws near its end and more than half of all our soul loves
has passed to the other side.
All of Thursday night she sat in Granny’s great rocking chair, and when
day came, while her joys seemed gone forever, her grief had been dulled.
She found a dulling consolation in working about the house and in
looking after the creatures of the barnyard. In the afternoon her head
ached so, she laid down; and sleep came and comforted her.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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