SIMON. (_sinking again into easy chair, R. C._) My wife will be back directly. ADELA. I am sorry, madam, to have interrupted your walk. FRANK. I was coming home, for the dew is beginning to fall. SIMON. (_aside_) I wish my wages were falling due--I can't stand this. FRANK. (_patting ADELAIDE'S cheeks_) Ah! what a pretty little creature--ah! what is your name, poppet? ADELA. Adelaide. FRANK. Ah! my name is Selina Matilda. You found Mr. Mitchell very dull company, didn't you? Wait a minute--I'll send him to bed. (_shouting_) Philomel! Philomel! (_aside to SIMON, and giving him a sly punch_) Why don't you answer, you brute? SIMON. Oh, is that me? FRANK. Go to bed, my cherished love. (_aside to him_) Be off, you beast! (_aloud_) I will assist you as far as your chamber. Come, dear love. (_raising SIMON from chair_) SIMON. (_aside to him_) Do you mean it? FRANK. Of course I do. (_kicking him slyly_) Idiot! SIMON. Oh! I say, that hurts, you know. FRANK. (_leading him towards door, R._) Come, cherished husband of my youth--worshipped of my old age. (_seeing ADELAIDE is not looking_) Get out, you hippopotamus! (_giving him a violent kick and bundling him off violently, door, R._) ADELA. (_turning at the noise_) What was that? FRANK. Nothing--my poor husband knocked his head against the door post, that's all. (_aside_) What a charming little creature she is! Now, tell me, my love, who sent you here? ADELA. Oh, you know perfectly well, your friend, Mr. Dunstable. FRANK. Ah, to be sure. I hope Mr. Constable is quite well. ADELA. Dunstable--yes, madam. FRANK. And his wife? ADELA. His wife! Why he has been a widower for the last fifteen years. FRANK. (_aside_) Phew! (_aloud_) Ah, to be sure, she is dead, then she is quite well. (_singing_) When we are dead it's for a long time, Says the old adage with wisdom rife; When we are dead it's for a long time, And we're cured of the tooth-ache for all our life. (_laughing_) He, he, he! you will soon see, my dear, that I am a very gay old lady. ADELA. I see that already! FRANK. My duck, I suppose you have a sweetheart? ADELA. A sweetheart? FRANK. You needn't mind telling me, I'm an old woman, you know; you are young and pretty. Ah, when I was your age, I pledge you my word I was a beauty. ADELA. No doubt of it, madam. FRANK. Ah, on the day of my marriage with Mr. Mitchell--and that reminds me, I want my supper. ADELA. The table is already laid yonder. I will bring it to this room. _Exit, door, L._ FRANK. Wait for me, my love; I'll assist you. (_toddles to door, L., and he and ADELAIDE bring on table ready served; they place the table, C., and sit; ADELAIDE is moving the lamp nearer to FRANK_) FRANK. (_R. of table_) No, no, don't do that, my dear, my eyes are so weak; why here is only one plate and knife and fork. ADELA. (_L. of table_) It doesn't matter, I have no appetite. FRANK. Nor I. (_filling glasses_) But a glass of wine----