MENELAUS [in a rage]. Out of my sight, perfidious Nubian. [Sounds of
confusion in the courtyard. Suddenly she springs to her feet and yells
at the top of her voice.]
TSUMU. He was Paris, Prince of Troy!
[They all start back. ANALYTIKOS stumbles into a seat. MENELAUS turns
pale. TSUMU leers like a black Nemesis.]
ANALYTIKOS [very ominously]. Who can read the secret of the Fates?
MENELAUS [frightened]. What do you mean?
ANALYTIKOS. He is the son of Priam, King of Troy.
TSUMU [adding fuel]. And of Hecuba, Queen of the Trojans. [She rushes
out to spread the news.]
ANALYTIKOS. That makes the matter international.
MENELAUS [quickly]. But we have treaties with Troy.
ANALYTIKOS. Circumstances alter treaties. They will mean nothing.
MENELAUS. Nothing?
ANALYTIKOS. No more than a scrap of papyrus. Sparta will fight to regain
her Queen.
MENELAUS. But I don't want her back.
ANALYTIKOS. Can you tell that to Sparta? Remember, the King can do no
wrong. Last night I dreamed of war.
MENELAUS. No! No! Don't say that. After the scandal I can't be expected
to fight to get her back.
ANALYTIKOS. Sparta will see with the eyes of chivalry.
MENELAUS [fuming]. But I don't believe in war.
ANALYTIKOS [still obdurate]. Have you forgotten the oath pledged of old,
with Ulysses and Agamemnon? They have sworn, if ever the time came, to
fight and defend the Queen.
MENELAUS [bitterly]. I didn't think of the triple alliance.
ANALYTIKOS. Can Sparta ask less of her King?
MENELAUS. Let's hear the other side. We can perhaps arbitrate. Peace at
any price.
ANALYTIKOS. Some bargains are too cheap.
MENELAUS [hopelessly]. But I am a pacifist.
ANALYTIKOS. You are Menelaus of Sparta, and Sparta's a nation of
soldiers.
MENELAUS [desperately]. I am too proud to fight!
ANALYTIKOS. Here, put on your shield. [A great clamor comes up from
the courtyard. ANALYTIKOS steps out on the balcony and is greeted with
shouts of "The King! The King!" Addressing the crowd.] People of Sparta,
this calamity has been forced upon us.
[MENELAUS winces.] We are a peaceful people. But thanks to our
unparalleled efficiency, the military system of Sparta is the most
powerful in all Greece and we can mobilize in half an hour.
[Loud acclaims from the people. MENELAUS, the papyrus still in hand,
crawls over and attempts to stop ANALYTIKOS.]
ANALYTIKOS [not noticing him]. In the midst of connubial and communal
peace the thunderbolt has fallen on the King.[MENELAUS tugs at
ANALYTIKOS' robe.] Broken in spirit as he is, he is already pawing the
ground like a battle steed. Never will we lay down our arms! We and
Jupiter! [Cheers.] Never until the Queen is restored to Menelaus. Never,
even if it takes ten years.
[MENELAUS squirms. A loud cheer.]
HELENA'S HUSBAND Even now the King is buckling on his shield. [More
cheers. ANALYTIKOS steps farther forward and then with bursting
eloquence.]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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