Watch Yourself Go ByField, Al. G. (Alfred Griffith)
General
Watch Yourself Go By
Field, Al. G. (Alfred Griffith)
Circus performers -- United States -- Biography; Field, Al. G. (Alfred Griffith), 1848-1921; Wit and humor
Alfred was pretty sure aim generally, but he had not experimented with
the sort of ammunition he was using on this occasion; he was not
familiar with its scattering qualities. Alfred did not have time to
either see or hear how his aim had affected Cousin Albert. There was an
angry confusion of yells and curses extending down the line of march.
Alfred felt sure that something awful had happened.
"Catch him! Hang him!" There was a shuffling of feet in the darkness.
Those at the head of the procession had dropped their torches. Alfred's
joke on Cousin Albert had spread to some twenty others; in fact, all in
line opposite the window were included in the joke.
There was a rush for the old tan-house. Alfred flew. Down the stairs,
over the fence, through the widow Cunningham's, across the street,
through Captain Cox's yard and into his home, the thoroughly frightened
boy fled.
Pete Keifer, who had been in the army, a ninety day man, one of the
first to go to the front at the call of duty, one of the first to leave
for home after Bull Run, was most vehement in his threats on the lives
of those who had broken up the torch light procession. Keifer's hearing
was undoubtedly affected by the two pound lump that struck him in the
ear, and some scattering. Sammy Rowland's white shirt front caught a
cluster as large as a saucer. His wife said she had a feeling something
was going to happen when he put on a biled shirt on a week day.
Aaron Todd, who wore a set of whiskers that would have sent him to the
Senate had he lived in Kansas, carried home concealed in his whiskers a
pound or so of Alfred's joke.
Alfred lay in bed trembling. Every sound, every footstep on the street
startled him. When the father returned home he trembled until the bed
shook, fearing it was the mob entering the house. He heard his father
laughing, also the mother; then he heard footsteps on the stairs.
Pretending to be sound asleep he snored loudly. As his father neared the
bed he pretended to suddenly awake. The parent carelessly inquired: "How
long you been in bed?"
"Oh, I don't know how long, I've been asleep. Why? Is there anything
happened?" asked Alfred as he pulled the clothes up over his head to
hide his laughter.
The father replied: "Yes there has and I feared you were mixed up in it.
I am glad you came in early tonight." Then the father informed Alfred
that some half a dozen rowdies had hidden in the old tannery and
bombarded the Potts procession with all sorts of missiles and _things_.
He told of the rage of Keifer, the plight of Todd, etc.
Alfred was sorry the joke on Cousin Albert had miscarried but it seemed
to him the hand of fate guided his aim, as all those who suffered were
unfriendly, all save Sammy Rowland. He was a good friend with whom
Alfred had labored in the tan-yard.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account